Be a Maker of Peace

As this Christmas season commences, I have a suggestion. Let's all make a concerted effort to make peace in our world this year. It all starts with each of us as individuals. But you may ask what can one person do to make a difference in such a noisy contentious world? My answer is that you can do more than you imagine.

This year, as in every year, there is chaos everywhere. We end each year, it seems, determined to do better in the coming year. That's what New Year's resolutions are designed to help us focus on. We get to breathe a huge sigh of relief as we recount what happened to us in the year. We pause, we slow down and reflect, and we are often overwhelmed with sorrow and grief over the tragedies that have hit us. Often these setbacks have come upon us uninvited and certainly unwelcomed. And yet, come they do and there seems to be little we can do to stop them.

It's the stuff of which this mortal probation is all about. If life were predictable and everything always worked out exactly the way we drew it up in our planning, there would be no testing, no opposition and no stretching to help us progress to a higher and holier place. Indeed, we would be following blindly like robots programmed for perfection without having paid a price for any of it ourselves. And whose idea was that in the beginning? Oh wait, I remember now:

And the Lord said: Whom shall I send? And one answered like unto the Son of Man: Here am I, send me. And another answered and said: Here am I, send me. And the Lord said: I will send the first.

And the second was angry, and kept not his first estate; and, at that day, many followed after him. (Abraham 3:27-28).

And I, the Lord God, spake unto Moses, saying: That Satan, whom thou hast commanded in the name of mine Only Begotten, is the same which was from the beginning, and he came before me, saying — Behold, here am I, send me, I will be thy son, and I will redeem all mankind, that one soul shall not be lost, and surely I will do it; wherefore give me thine honor. 

But, behold, my Beloved Son, which was my Beloved and Chosen from the beginning, said unto me — thy will be done, and the glory be thine forever. 

Wherefore, because that Satan rebelled against me, and sought to destroy the agency of man, which I, the Lord God, had given him, and also, that I should give unto him mine own power; by the power of mine Only Begotten, I caused that he should be cast down; 

And he became Satan, yea, even the devil, the father of all lies, to deceive and to blind men, and to lead them captive at his will, even as many as would not hearken unto my voice. 

And now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field which I, the Lord God, had made. 

And Satan put it into the heart of the serpent, (for he had drawn away many after him,) and he sought also to beguile Eve, for he knew not the mind of God, wherefore he sought to destroy the world. (Moses 4:1-6). 

In today's world, we are witnessing the adherents to Satan at war with one another. Some in the Church are still fond of citing the "two plans" that were posited in the beginning. But, there were never two plans, only one plan - the Father's plan. At issue was who would implement THAT ONE PLAN. 

The Father's great plan of happiness included the agency of man "which I, the Lord God, had given him, that I should give unto him mine own power; by the power of mine Only Begotten." 

In opposition to the Father's plan Satan offered to redeem everyone and to have the Father give him all the honor and glory. Because of his rebellion, he was cast down, deprived of the privilege of a mortal body. 

Satan must have been very persuasive, however, because we learn "at that day many followed after him." When we think about all those - dare we call them "evil spirits?" - who followed Satan in the pre-existence, then we do the math on it, let's look at Neal A. Maxwell's analysis: 

64,000,000,000 who have lived in physical bodies on Earth to 1976 

~ 70,000,000,000 to 1984 (Maxwell's estimate) or 2/3 of all the spirits 

35,000,000,000 or 1/3 of all the hosts of heaven who followed Satan 

The current world population is 8,076,994,357 as of Wednesday, December 6, 2023 according to the most recent United Nations estimates elaborated by Worldometer. 

Now think about this: For every one of us Satan has about four of his minions he could assign to us to help him in his avowed mission to "destroy the world." Seems a little overwhelming doesn't it? Here's the good news: God has called only one prophet at a time to send His redeeming love into the world to bless all His children, and that man, that one man, is President Russell M. Nelson. That one man has been a consistent champion and witness to the divinity of the Savior Jesus Christ, who was chosen by the Father to implement that ONE PLAN of redeeming grace.

President Russell M. Nelson

When he dies (he's in his 100th year today!), as surely he will, God will raise up another prophet in his stead to carry forward the work of gathering Israel in these last days until the Savior comes again to rule and reign on Earth. Here's what the prophet has said about peacemakers: 

"At this point you may be thinking that this message [to become peacemakers] would really help someone you know. Perhaps you are hoping that it will help him or her to be nicer to you. I hope it will! But I also hope that you will look deeply into your heart to see if there are shards of pride or jealousy that prevent you from becoming a peacemaker. 

"If you are serious about helping to gather Israel and about building relationships that will last throughout the eternities, now is the time to lay aside bitterness. Now is the time to cease insisting that it is your way or no way. Now is the time to stop doing things that make others walk on eggshells for fear of upsetting you. Now is the time to bury your weapons of war. If your verbal arsenal is filled with insults and accusations, now is the time to put them away. You will arise as a spiritually strong man or woman of Christ. 

"The temple can help us in our quest. There we are endowed with God’s power, giving us the ability to overcome Satan, the instigator of all contention. Cast him out of your relationships! Note that we also rebuke the adversary every time we heal a misunderstanding or refuse to take offense. Instead, we can show the tender mercy that is characteristic of true disciples of Jesus Christ. Peacemakers thwart the adversary. 

"Let us as a people become a true light on the hill — a light that 'cannot be hid.' Let us show that there is a peaceful, respectful way to resolve complex issues and an enlightened way to work out disagreements. As you demonstrate the charity that true followers of Jesus Christ manifest, the Lord will magnify your efforts beyond your loftiest imagination.

"The gospel net is the largest net in the world. God has invited all to come unto Him, 'black and white, bond and free, male and female.' There is room for everyone. However, there is no room for prejudice, condemnation, or contention of any kind. 

"My dear brothers and sisters, the best is yet to come for those who spend their lives building up others. Today I invite you to examine your discipleship within the context of the way you treat others. 

"I bless you to make any adjustments that may be needed so that your behavior is ennobling, respectful, and representative of a true follower of Jesus Christ. 

"God lives! Jesus is the Christ. He stands at the head of this Church. We are His servants. He will help us to become His peacemakers." https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2023/04/47nelson?lang=eng

I had the perfect example of a peacemaker in my own home. Patsy was always a peacemaker who shunned even the slightest hint of contention. She lifted others, blessed them with her grace and her love. She served them constantly, tirelessly and championed them in their adversities. She even worried about them, but even in that one weakness she ultimately overcame her worry with faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. She took her worries to Him in everything, and in time - His time - solutions presented themselves to which she immediately subscribed and put into action. 

We are often talked out of our good intentions by the four evil spirits working on our faith. We too often are convinced that we are just one person, and what can only one weak individual like us do to bring about improvements in a wicked world? 

When you are tempted with those faulty thoughts, think about what one prophet, one mother, one father, one son or daughter, one bishop, one Relief Society President, one ministering saint can do, and then be assured that you are not just one. As our son, Steve, reminded us at Patsy's funeral, "When we show up our gifts show up too." What a priceless insight that is for each of us. You just have to "show up." 

But you might counter, "I don't have any gifts compared to everyone else around me." Again, that thought is worse than faulty. It is Satanic. Your gifts are many and they are powerful, more efficacious in someone else's life than you will ever know. 

When I think about Patsy's gifts and how they have been multiplied many times over into a posterity that now numbers over ninety precious souls in mortal tabernacles who are faithful and serving the best they know how, I have come to believe that none of us should ever discount our capability for good in such dismissive terms as, "I'm just not good enough." Or, "What difference can I make?" Or, "I am only one person." Stop it, already! 

You can be that peacemaker in your marriage, in your ward, in your stake, in your calling in the Church wherever it may take you, and don't be surprised when you get to the spirit world to be surrounded by your kindred spirits for whom you did all those vicarious ordinances in the temples. You are blessing legions whom you have never met in this life!! 

Only you, only one person, only someone as insignificant and weak as you. 

Only someone who learned how to make peace.

Julianna Hayes Hewlett - Home at Last

This week we said our final farewells to our adopted Mother and Grandmother, Julianna Hayes Hewlett. She departed this life at age 82, after a forty-year separation from her eternal companion, Patsy's father Lester F. Hewlett, Jr. We came to love her as our own. I am publishing her first-person life sketch here so that many of her beloved students and their families will have the funeral information. Feel free to share the link with everyone who may have interest.

Viewing: Larkin Mortuary (260 E. So. Temple St., Salt Lake), Sunday July 9th 6-8 p.m.

Funeral: Salt Lake 11th Ward (951 E. 100 So., Salt Lake), Monday, July 10th, viewing 10-11:30 a.m., followed by the funeral services at noon.

Interment: Woodland Cemetery, Woodland, Utah 84036

Life Sketch of Julianna Hayes Hewlett

I was born January 21, 1941, in Montpelier, Idaho, the only daughter of William Earl and Verona Schmid Hayes. I had three brothers, Deon (who died at eighteen months), William Dorain Hayes, and Elwyn “Chip” Hayes. Only Chip remains behind in our little family with my passing, and how I have adored him and his wife Sandy! If Chip ever missed a day calling me in the last forty years, I do not remember it.

We moved many places in Idaho and Wyoming following my father’s Union Pacific Railroad occupation. At age four, my mother found me “practicing the piano,” using the arm of the sofa as my keyboard, as we had no such instrument. At that point my parents felt I should be taking lessons as soon as there was money to rent a piano. Fortunately, the Bancroft chapel was being remodeled, and Father requested that our home be used as a place to store the ward piano. Thus began my lessons, and a continuing lifetime interest in music.

I graduated with honors from BYU and began teaching music at Hillside Junior High School in Salt Lake City. My first class in public school teaching was a Boys’ Choir of 103 voices from the 7^th, 8^th and 9^th grades. It proved to be a year of MY education learning how to deal with teenaged mentality.

In 1968, while recuperating in Idaho from a spinal fusion I received a call from President Florence Jacobsen to serve on the General Board of the MIA. Traveling and speaking in many regional conferences, writing lessons and manuals for the MIA, and beginning work of the new LDS hymn book, were highlights in that phase of my Church activity. I also conducted a regional young special interest choir in the Tabernacle for a regional conference.

In 1969, I took a Sabbatical Leave and traveled to Germany with the University of Oregon, where I lived with a German family, toured the famous music schools of Europe, and later received a master’s degree in international music and art education.

I transferred to Highland High School in 1975, teaching choirs and beginning a Humanities class, studying the arts, philosophy and history. I began taking summer tours to Europe to study the wealth of art, music and literature in the world’s greatest museums.

I was reluctantly and unexpectedly lined up on a blind date in 1977, with Lester F. Hewlett, Jr. It was an amazing spiritual recognition, and I cancelled my summer tour to Europe to be sealed in the Salt Lake Temple on July 6, 1977. My father said in April of that year I would be married before summer’s end. His prediction came true. It was truly a match made in heaven.

Les had been the mission president in the Australia South Mission and had previously served on the Young Men’s General Board and on the Church Athletic Committee. Having been one of the first missionaries to open Alaska to missionary work, Les thus began a lifelong love of missionary work. After returning from Australia, he continued volunteering on Temple Square as a tour guide, where his love of the gospel and commitment to missionary work focused his continuing service.

We moved to the Graystone Condominiums in 1978, where Les was the teacher of the high priest group, and I taught the Relief Society cultural refinement lessons. How I loved bringing the joy of music, art and literature to the sisters in the Grant 4^th Ward (later became the Forestview Ward). Traveling with Elder LeGrand Richards for the dedication of the Orson Hyde Memorial was truly one of the highlights of our six years together. At the insistence of Elder Richards, I led the group in “Master the Tempest is Raging” as we crossed the Sea of Galilee and afterward sat in a testimony meeting on the shore. I realized once again the truthfulness of the gospel, and better understood the love Les and I shared in Church service.

Les and I belonged to the Dinnerset Group, and on December 9, 1983, Les and I were the chairpersons of the annual Christmas party at the Lion House. Associating, as the Hewlett family had done for many years with many of the members of the Quorum of the Twelve, we sat with Elder and Sister Neal A. Maxwell singing Christmas carols. I conducted the music in my new red shoes that Les had just bought me.

The next morning, I awakened to find that Les had slipped to the other side of the veil while he slept. The shock was multiplied by the fact he had not been ill. As Elder Maxwell stated at his funeral, “He was blessed not to have tasted death. He was a guileless man.” He loved and gave many blessings to the widows in our ward whom he served as their home teacher.

The years since his passing have found me continuing to teach at Highland, conducting tours occasionally to Europe with students, serving as gospel doctrine teacher, ward music chairman, ward chorister, and teaching Relief Society cultural refinement lessons.

One of the highlights of my music and Church service was in October 1990, when I was invited to conduct a Young Women’s Choir for the afternoon session of General Conference in the Tabernacle. I led 400 young women from the Bountiful and Val Verde Regions, united in beautiful voice and spirit to praise the Lord. It was more memorable by having chosen the hymn, “We Ever Pray for Thee,” and then finding President Benson had been taken to the hospital that weekend. The choice of that hymn had been made by me in July, well before President Benson became acutely ill.

In 1991, a grandson, Ben Pahnke, died of leukemia. Our family was comforted in knowing Les was there to welcome eight-year-old Ben to his heavenly home. Again, in 1993, our seven-week-old grand-daughter Adrienne Goates, was taken home, and Les was seen at her funeral by members of his extended family. It is an incredible comfort knowing the veil is thin and eternal love is strong.

As the years have brought Les’ four children and their families much closer together, I have enjoyed the plethora of grandchildren and great-grandchildren. I have loved and been loved as I never could have imagined in my younger single years. All the children, Nancy Pahnke, Patsy Goates, John Hewlett and Ernie Hewlett, have homes at the Ranch above Woodland, where Les and I spent our summers and where the spirit of FAMILY is so intense and loving.

My calling to the Salt Lake Temple as an ordinance worker has been the highlight of my retirement years.

These last years have been filled with physical challenges, but I have used faith, prayers and priesthood blessings to endure to the end. “When upon life’s billows we are tempest tossed, when we are discouraged thinking, all is lost, count your many blessings, name them one by one, and it will surprise you what the Lord has done.”

That ends Julie’s obituary in her first-person narrative, but as her adopted Hewlett family we would update the record to state she won a place in all our hearts. She might easily be the most fiercely independent, tenacious and strong-willed woman any of us will ever encounter. However, as she lived her life to its conclusion in the early morning hours of June 29, 2023, we are constrained to conclude in her 82 years of living she filled the full measure of her creation, and she finally and gleefully entered the eternal embrace of her beloved Les after a forty-year absence.

Eternity in the Making

The morning of December 19, 1969 dawned crisp and clear in Salt Lake City, Utah. I picked up my bride-to-be, Patsy Hewlett, early on our way to the Salt Lake Temple to be sealed for time and for all eternity to each other. My Grandfather, Harold B. Lee, then one of the senior Apostles in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, was scheduled to officiate at the ordinance that would bind us to one another. He was very emotional during the brief ceremony, sensing, I felt, the spirits of those who would come through our union. I believe he knew the identities of each one who would come to join our family.

On another December day fifty years later in 2019 we would gather as many of our children and grandchildren as we could to participate in a sealing session in the Salt Lake Temple just before it closed for what will be an extensive four-year renovation. We were assigned to the sealing room behind the old sealing office just off the Celestial Room to perform proxy ordinances of marriage for our deceased ancestors – all family names our family had prepared. One by one we took our turns at the altar in the center of the room and relived again the morning it all began with just the two of us in 1969. This time the altar was surrounded by our cherished posterity, all of whom had been sealed as couples in previous live ordinances for themselves. The realization of that blessing pronounced upon us fifty years earlier had come to pass, fifty years in the making.

Patsy and I have been through many wonderful and challenging times together over those fifty years. Perhaps the most humbling of all has been this last several years as we sought diligently to petition our Father in Heaven for answers to my deteriorating health. The downward slide accelerated in the last six months. I know it is good to be humble without being compelled to be humble, but this last six months especially we have been compelled to be humble. Our circumstances are not unusual for most people as they grow older. Few old people I have known are afraid to die, it’s just the getting there that is so difficult.

We simply could not find that elusive answer to why I was “off” from what everyone had known me to be earlier in my life. Then the meningioma brain tumor was diagnosed, and the answer to the medical mystery was staring right back at us from the doctor’s computer screen. It was the brain that had been squeezed and compressed over a long period.

So compromised had I become pre-surgery that I calculated I was at about a 2 on a 100 scale. I had my heart and my lungs that were still functioning well – everything else had been shut down as my brain’s way of compensating to keep me alive. Simple tasks in earlier years were now seemingly impossible to accomplish. My brain told me I could do these things – I had always done these things – but I had lost the ability to do them. My doctor had told me, “Anybody can exercise for ten minutes a day,” and I agreed in principle to that statement. I had gone for much longer periods of heavier exercise before. But I couldn’t do it anymore. I could barely get out of bed, and then I wobbled badly on my weak leg muscles.  

Post-surgery I wasn’t much better for three weeks. I was childlike. I had to master the control of my bladder and my bowels again like a little child in diapers, and I was wearing adult diapers. I was compelled to be humble. I had to learn to eat for myself again. I had to learn to balance and to walk again, at first mastering only a few steps to the bathroom and back using a walker for balance. I couldn’t do any of those things I had always done until my brain fog cleared and the blood clot that occupied the space where the tumor had been in my brain at the incision spot had dissipated. It took about three weeks.

Now our prayers have been fully answered. I have been cured and I have been healed. Humility is now once again a choice for me.

Fifty years is a long time to be married to the same person. It’s a golden time in our lives now. That’s why no one knew me better than Patsy, and why her instincts (impressions of the Spirit) could not be dismissed so easily. She knew me better than I knew myself, and she certainly knew me better than all the doctors and their scientific training. Once they listened to her and responded to her demands for the MRI, the source of our long struggle for answers was finally revealed.

We have been studying together the outlines of the Book of Mormon chapters in Come Follow Me. We are now into the book of Helaman. There is a constant ebb and flow among the Nephites and Lamanites at this point in their history. One year the Lamanites are repenting and receiving great blessings from the Lord, then they become prideful. Another year the Nephites are repenting, and they become more righteous than the Lamanites and they are blessed continually. Then this one verse leaps out as a pattern scripture for us to learn to live by, whether we are “Lamanites” or “Nephites:”

Nevertheless they did fast and pray oft, and did wax stronger and stronger in their humility and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ, unto the filling their souls with joy and consolation, yea, even to the purifying and the sanctification of their hearts,  which sanctification cometh because of their yielding their hearts unto God. (Helaman 3:34).

My children are old enough now to see some of their friends who were once faithful members of the Church begin leaving and taking their families with them into the wilderness of apostasy because they have “done their research” and learned about “facts” they were never taught in the Church. They often come to me with their stories about their friends who have left, and they are saddened by the stories they read on their friends’ social media pages about their reasons for leaving. I encourage my children to be patient and to try to be like Heavenly Father. Can you imagine Him pacing around His throne wringing His hands over every soul who turns away for a season? Having vouched safe the moral agency of His children from the beginning and put a Redeemer in place to assure the demands of justice are fully satisfied through mercy conditioned upon the repentance of His children, He waits patiently for the fruits of the vineyard to come forth in the glorious harvest He envisions for each of His children. That’s the perspective we must have too – be patient and wait for the harvest that will surely come.

Mormon uses a phrase “thus we see” as an editorial comment in his editorial work of summarizing the records:

Yea, we see that whosoever will may lay hold upon the word of God, which is quick and powerful, which shall divide asunder all the cunning and the snares and the wiles of the devil, and lead the man of Christ in a strait and narrow course across that everlasting gulf of misery which is prepared to engulf the wicked – And land their souls, yea, their immortal souls, at the right hand of God in the kingdom of heaven, to sit down with Abraham, and Isaac, and with Jacob, and with all our holy fathers to go no more out. (Helaman 3:29-30).

Let us all “lay hold” upon the word of God, slow down, turn down the noise in our busy lives, take a deep breath, ponder and pray, follow the pattern given to us as cited above, and land our souls at the right hand of God.

 We are in a war for our souls. Believe me I know that as never before. In the varied battles of life Satan takes many prisoners and inflicts many injuries and even deaths. But if we are true and faithful, we will prevail in the final battle of this war, for so it has been written and the scriptures are true. We are building for the eternities, and we are just now beginning to discern the light at the end of the long tunnel of sin and deception.

Thoughts on Independence, Moral Agency, SSM and Eternal Truth

I've been asked by more than a few followers of this page why I haven't posted anything about the recent ruling of the SCOTUS on same sex marriage. The short answer is that Patsy recently decided to exchange her bad knee for a cobalt steel replacement part, and her surgery and recovery have pre-occupied my free time. Now it's Independence Day weekend and I have a chance to reflect.

The Supreme Court of the United States of America

I find these latest developments in the LGBTQ (yes "Q" has been added - meaning "questioning" my sexuality) agenda to be so ironic. On the one hand we find advocates asserting their independence and exercising their moral agency to choose homosexuality. And on the other hand they could not be more anti-Christ than they are.

It was Christ in the pre-existence who championed our moral agency. We who walk the earth today were there as pre-mortal spirits. We sanctioned the plan of our Father in Heaven, the centerpiece of which was the ability to choose between right and wrong here in mortality. The consequences for our choices are not always immediately in evidence. Sometimes years go by before we reverse course and repent. Knowing there would be universal opposition to the truth, promoted and advocated by Satan and his minions, we accepted the offer of our Elder Brother, Jesus Christ, to come to earth, live the perfect life, and sacrifice Himself for all of us to satisfy all the demands of justice under the laws of God. There weren't "two plans" put forward - only one plan - and our Lord and Savior became the Chosen One to implement that plan.

So I find it sadly ironic, because there seems little more that I could offer at this point that I haven't already said on the matter. The plan of salvation, referred to as "the great plan of happiness" (see Alma 42) by Alma, has as the bedrock principle the creation of mortal bodies to house the spirits created by God. In order to bring to pass the immortality and the eternal life of man (see Moses 1:39), God's stated purpose for His existence, we must assist in His work by bringing to pass the mortality of man by providing the mortal bodies for those spirits. Gender identification is also imprinted as part of the plan. Males and females are distinctly unique in the creative process. Each contributes a piece to make a new human body. The two parts are joined together in a holy union, a holy matrimony, to complete the plan.

The perversions around human sexuality are no longer secret, nor spoken in hushed secret corners. In fact, those perversions which until a few years ago were against the laws of most states, are now freely available to all who would choose them. The SCOTUS, make that one justice of the SCOTUS in a 5-4 vote, who wrote the majority opinion, has chosen for the whole nation based upon the popular opinion of the electorate as registered in recent polling data about same sex marriage. I accept the ruling of the SCOTUS as the supreme law of the land in the highest court, even though I would side with those four justices who dissented.

You can herald the triumph of so-called "equal rights" and "equal access" to marriage if you choose - that is your right as well - but this latest decision has little to do with a Constitutional right. This wasn't about the Constitution, observed Chief Justice Roberts, writing in his minority opinion. Roberts correctly observed the Court had overturned the voice of the people who had voted to retain the definition of traditional marriage in the several States through their elected representatives in the Republic established under the Constitution. Nowhere in the Constitution can an "equal right" to gay marriage be found. You won't even find a definition of traditional marriage there. Instead, the Founders wisely left to the States the definitions and resolutions of those kinds of issues. At the federal level, power of, by and through the people's voice has been trampled upon once again.

This was about advancing the anti-Christ agenda, nothing more, nothing less. He didn't say that, I did.

Why anti-Christ? Because the argument that "God made me this way and there's nothing I can do about it," is fundamentally flawed. Those who so assert also claim there is no need to repent of their perversion because God made them that way. "I'm not sinning because there's nothing I can do about the way I am." How convenient. Those of us who were also made by God, by the extension of that reasoning must also get a "free pass" for repentance. We truly live in a day of "live and let live" and "God will beat me with a few stripes in the end" (2 Nephi 28:8) but I'll eventually be saved in my sins because God loves me just as much as He does you. But as scripture reminds us, no one is saved in their sins. (Alma 11:34-37). The subtle rejection of the need for a Redeemer and the need for repentance is what is at the core of the LGBTQ agenda. However, you won't hear it expressed in those terms from them. Being "anti-Christ" isn't subtle enough for them. Instead, they seek to "normalize" the perversion so revulsion evaporates.

The perversions in the flesh are analogous to the perversions they make in the Word. A lawyer asked the Savior a question: "Master which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets." (Matthew 22:35-40).

In the name of "loving our neighbor" tolerance reached its pinnacle under hashtag #lovewins on word of the SCOTUS decision. It may be "love" in the eyes of homosexuals, but it still classifies as perversion as it was in the days of Sodom and Gomorrah. The legal definition of love now having been defined by the courts notwithstanding, marriage between a man and a woman is God's law.

I find it nothing short of stunning how quickly this agenda has advanced in public opinion. Even among members of the Church there seems to be a "no big deal" attitude. "If gay people want to get married, that's fine with me, what's the big deal?" they seem to repeat among themselves, as though there will be no consequences for those who have chosen their perversions. The weakening of the moral fiber not only in America but world-wide, is well-documented and now continues without much resistance it seems. What was once the silent sin of Sodom and Gomorrah is now splashed boldly in rainbow colors illuminating the White House.

There is no other word than "stunning" to describe it. People forget that in both elections in 2008 and 2012, President Barack Hussein Obama was elected by stating his support for traditional marriage to avoid risking the alienation of voters in the Hispanic, Black and other religious communities who also favored traditional marriage. And now a rainbow colored White House in celebration of same sex marriage? Well, there you have it. . . that's stunning! You can ask yourselves why it happened so quickly, but the easy answers might be the influence of media, including television sitcoms and the attempts by advocates to "normalize" homosexual behavior. "We're just like you are," they will claim, and being the tolerant neighbor-loving and embracing people we are, and not wanting to be classed as "homophobic" we have come to the conclusion it can't be all that bad. That's how public opinion shifted so easily. One author called it "The Big Gay Lie."

The First Presidency

The Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

Either this week or the following week, congregations in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will be discussing a lengthy letter produced by the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. We sustain these fifteen men as living prophets, seers and revelators. The topic of their letter to the Church will be the recent SCOTUS decision. Once again members of the Church will be given an opportunity to absorb, digest, discuss, and either support or oppose their leaders on this topic. It is not the first chance, nor will it be the last to weigh in.

The assaults on religious freedom will continue unabated. I would expect the Church to continue to be the bastion of eternal truth it has always been. They constantly warn against being "tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of [false] doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive." (See Ephesians 4:11-15). These fifteen men are the very reason Apostles were chosen and ordained in the meridian Church by Christ, and they are the modern-day counterparts.

I have read a lot, the ruling itself, all the dissents and much more while Patsy has been rehabbing her new knee. I have seen the comments of a lot of "good" members of the Church on forum boards and their social media postings. There are many who assert that like the question over Blacks receiving the priesthood and even longer ago with the rescission of plural marriage in the late 1800s, the Church will eventually come to its senses and bow to public opinion and political pressure on this issue too. They foresee a day when same sex marriages will be performed in the temples, just as Blacks were eventually granted equal access to all priesthood blessings.

But sadly, they will be wrong. Some say the Church will be on the wrong side of history unless it yields to public pressure. The passage of time will prove otherwise. Unless God has it in His mind to alter the bedrock doctrine of the great plan of happiness that has been revealed since the Creation without equivocation in Holy Writ, this question of "marriage equality" is nothing more than a cleverly crafted sophistry devised by Satan and his minions to separate the man from the woman. Since the plan was announced by our Father in Heaven and Satan opposed it in the pre-mortal council where we all upheld the plan, that has been his aim. (Moses 4:1-4). Don't forget that every single professed homosexual today is the product of the union of a man and a woman. Life is possible in no other way. If Satan succeeds in separating the man from the woman, if he undermines and erodes the underpinnings of traditional marriage, then the Father's announced purpose of His work and His glory can indeed be thwarted. That is Satan's aim, and he is making stunning progress toward achieving it. But in the end, he doesn't win if scripture is to be believed. (See a sampling in Revelation 19-22).

Don't seek to become an erudite so-called "Devil's Advocate". He has plenty of help already. Instead, seek to become a true disciple of Jesus Christ, not an anti-Christ who promotes and hails the LGBTQ agenda under the banner of political progress or equal rights. It is none of that. When you support and encourage their agenda you are in the ranks of the anti-Christs. You can't have this both ways any longer. The gulf between the two worlds is widening and can no longer be straddled comfortably as in the past.

I sound the warning voice here to those of you who are blindly advocating for something you don't fully understand - don't swallow the Kool-Aid by filling up your social media posts with exultation over what appears to be a "victory" for equal rights under the law. There are many examples of morally reprehensible behaviors that are legally protected. Abortion rights might be the most obvious example. This SCOTUS same sex marriage ruling is a short-term victory, like everything else that resembles a Satanic idea in opposition of eternal truth. Here's a sample from the Church's response:

"A family built on marriage of a man and a woman is the best setting for God’s plan of happiness to thrive. That is why communities and nations generally have encouraged and protected marriage between a man and a woman, and the family that results from their union, as privileged institutions. Sexual relations outside of such a marriage are contrary to the laws of God pertaining to morality.

"Changes in the civil law do not, indeed cannot, change the moral law that God has established. God expects us to uphold and keep His commandments regardless of divergent opinions or trends in society. His law of chastity is clear: sexual relations are proper only between a man and a woman who are legally and lawfully wedded as husband and wife. We invite all to review and understand the doctrine contained in 'The Family: A Proclamation to the World.'

"Consistent with our fundamental beliefs, Church officers will not employ their ecclesiastical authority to perform marriages between two people of the same sex, and the Church does not permit its meetinghouses or other properties to be used for ceremonies, receptions, or other activities associated with same‐sex marriages. Nevertheless, all visitors are welcome to our chapels and premises so long as they respect our standards of conduct while there."

Just as I have exercised my freedom of speech rights here, those of you who oppose my point of view are also free to express your opinion. We are all independent and we are free to choose whatever position we would like. We can do so respectfully but vociferously in whatever forum we elect. Remember, the blessing of moral agency, the freedom to choose and the subsequent consequences that go with those rights are all part of the plan of salvation. All of it has a root in God our Heavenly Father and in His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, who is our Redeemer. When you exult in choices outside the parameters of God's perfect plan, please stop to think twice before going further down that path.

I've had occasion recently to review every single entry in the personal journal of President Harold B. Lee. It has provided great insight into the inner workings among the men we sustain as prophets, seers and revelators. As part of that reading I also spent last Sunday re-reading the General Conference sermons of all the General Authorities during the 18-months tenure of President Lee. I discovered this statement in the General Priesthood Meeting of October 1972:

President Harold B. Lee, 1972

"I want to warn this great body of priesthood against that great sin of Sodom and Gomorrah, which has been labeled as a sin second only in seriousness to the sin of murder. I speak of the sin of adultery, which, as you know, was the name used by the Master as he referred to unlicensed sexual sins of fornication as well as adultery; and besides this, the equally grievous sin of homosexuality, which seems to be gaining momentum with social acceptance in the Babylon of the world, of which Church members must not be a part.

"While we are in the world, we must not be of the world. Any attempts being made by the schools or places of entertainment to flaunt sexual perversions, which can do nothing but excite to experimentation, must find among the priesthood in this church a vigorous and unrelenting defense through every lawful means that can be employed.

"The common judges of Israel, our bishops and stake presidents, must not stand by and fail to apply disciplinary measures within their jurisdiction, as set forth plainly in the laws of the Lord and procedures as set forth in plain and simple instructions that cannot be misunderstood. Never must we allow supposed mercy to the unrepentant sinner to rob the justice upon which true repentance from sinful practices is predicated."

Note in his statement, there is no "special class" that eludes the demands of justice because "I was born this way." As President Lee suggested way back then, "every lawful means" to oppose same sex marriage has been undertaken, and time and again the courts have struck down those attempts. Losing in the court of public opinion, however, is no new development the Church is seeing for the first time. It has been the unrelenting reality of the Church's existence since 1830. The Savior faced rejection daily during His mortal ministry. The rejection of the world is the inherent theme of walking the straight and narrow path leading to the tree of life, and those who mock today may find in their ranks the members of the Church who have been deceived even when they were once among "the very elect". (See 1 Nephi 11-14; D&C 45:57-59; Matthew 24:24; JST Matthew 22; 37; D&C 33:16-18).

One son asked me last week if this assault on religious liberty would force the Latter-day Saints into the seclusion of our religious practice in our homes. I reminded him of the Church's missionary mandate. We cannot invite the world to "come unto Christ" by living like cloistered monks behind the protection of the walls of our homes. We as Church members must vigorously defend eternal truth as only found in the revealed word of God. Anything outside that scope, while legal and politically progressive (even correct!), may not be, and often is not, moral.

Even the SCOTUS does not have the final word on the moral code as defined by our Creator.

"I Give Unto Men WEAKNESS"

In our meetings in the Church, there is a scripture that is often quoted to illustrate that God gives men their weaknesses in the flesh, and therefore our weaknesses are to be expected and in some ways, it seems, even explained away. After all, the reasoning goes, God gave them to us.

I am hoping to help others understand that is not at all what the scripture says. The Lord is offering comfort to Moroni as he compiles the gold plates of the history of his people, and Moroni is worried people will make fun of it because of his weakness in writing:

"If men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble." (Ether 12:27).

Please take note: The word is "weakness" and NOT "weaknesses". There is a fundamental difference. As a young man attempting the read The Book of Mormon, I was not far into my studies before discovering I was not alone in my spiritual wrestles with God. I found a soul mate in Nephi, one of my early prophet heroes:

"Notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted. My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep. He hath filled me with his love, even unto the consuming of my flesh. He hath confounded mine enemies, unto the causing of them to quake before me. Behold, he hath heard my cry by day, and he hath given me knowledge by visions in the nighttime. And by day have I waxed bold in mighty prayer before him; yea, my voice have I sent up on high; and angels came down and ministered unto me. And upon the wings of his Spirit hath my body been carried away upon exceedingly high mountains. And mine eyes have beheld great things, yea, even too great for man; therefore I was bidden that I should not write them.
"O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions? And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?" (2 Nephi 4:17-27), emphasis mine.

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Nephi asked himself what President Uchtdorf asked all men of the priesthood to ask themselves at the last General Conference - "Lord, is it I?" Why do we continue to sin, even when we know better? And how is it our definitions of what constitutes sin become so convoluted as we rationalize away the conditions of our mortal probation? I remember one very bright and intelligent young man who explained his rationalization about pornography this way: "Bishop, I only really have one sin and I'm determined to wear that one out for the rest of my life because everything else is in pretty good shape except for that. Relatively speaking, I'd say I'm doing pretty well." I always wondered what his wife might say if she knew his reasoning. I don't really know what happened to him after that, but I pray he came to view his rationalization more clearly as he matured with a little more wisdom.

To refer once again to Moroni, the Lord declared: "If men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble." (Ether 12:27), emphasis mine.

The word "weakness" is not plural and so cannot refer to the multitude of sins we all struggle with. Being singular, it most likely would refer to our mortal condition, which indeed, was given to us by our Lord, for He alone is the "light and the life of the world." We sometimes see our mortal flesh referred to in scripture as "the natural man" (see 1 Corinthians 2:14; Mosiah 3:19; Alma 26:21; D&C 67:12) or our "carnal nature" (see D&C 67:12; Mosiah 16:5; Alma 42:10).

By our very mortal, physical natures - our "natural man" - we all have an inherent tendency to commit sin. That tendency, not the multitudes of named weaknesses, as some would have us believe, according to what the Lord told Moroni, was intentionally "given" to us by God. How was it given? Through our inherited genetic traits, conditions under which we are raised, the torments and taunts of Satan's minions, physical and difficult mortal circumstances we are forced to live through, and others. And why are we so weak in the flesh? The scriptural answer seems to be to help keep us humble, penitent, and provide a way for our spirits to overcome as we grow in faith in the Lord's perfection and His power to redeem us from our fallen condition. Without a weak and sin-inclined physical body to provide the means for the opposition needed to sanctify us, the plan of salvation would be thwarted. In the overcoming, in the yielding to the Spirit, in the stretching of our faith, we are made better men and women than we ever could be otherwise. So we see, our mortal weakness is a blessing.

I loved what President Uchtdorf said about it:

"The words of the Apostle James apply to us today:
"God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. . . Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up." (James 4:6,10).
"Brethren, we must put aside our pride, see beyond our vanity, and in humility ask, 'Lord, is it I?'
"And if the Lord's answer happens to be 'Yes, my son, there are things you must improve, things I can help you to overcome,' I pray that we will accept this answer, humbly acknowledge our sins and shortcomings, and then change our ways by becoming better husbands, better fathers, better sons. May we from this time forward seek with all our might to walk steadfastly in the Savior's blessed way - for seeing ourselves clearly is the beginning of wisdom."
"As we do so, our bountiful God will lead us by the hand; we will 'be made strong, and blessed from on high.'" (D&C 1:28). ("Lord, Is It I?", President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Ensign, November 2014, 56-58).

I can bear a solemn and true testimony that when we ask God to show us our weakness and how we may overcome whatever tendencies to sin that impede our path, He will generously answer that humble prayer. There will be no holding back. You will be shown how to improve. When your prayers include how you may bless others through your influence, He also answers quickly and with precision. As you take action on the promptings, you will receive more and more. The cumulative effect can be inspiring and faith-building.

When we recognize tendencies to stray, to do evil, and to otherwise violate the basic operations of our conscience, we are not automatically and therefore evil in all things. Instead, evil only occurs when we submit to the tendencies and the temptations. (Mosiah 3:19). Remember, God has given us our mortal bodies through which these carnal or natural tendencies are presented to us so we may be blessed by "the enticings of the Holy Spirit," and thus become humble, penitent, and filled with faith in Christ. As we wander around in mortality, we may seek to overcome our own "natural man," and that includes being shown and coming to a full understanding of our personal weakness. By understanding that weakness, we will be better armed to completely overcome the temptations of the mortal flesh.

Remember, the grace of Christ is what delivers us as we repent and come unto Him. His perfect love for us is only possible because He paid the full price (no discounts) for our sins. It's what the qualifier, the big word IF means - "If men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness." He will! He does! He liberates! He redeems! One of the most blessed scriptures I know provides eternal hope for all in these words:

"My grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. Behold, I will show unto the Gentiles their weakness and I will show unto them that faith, hope and charity bringeth unto me — the fountain of all righteousness" (Ether 12:27-28), emphasis mine.

C. S. Lewis

I loved what C. S. Lewis said about the ongoing nature of our quest for becoming more godlike while we toil here below in mortality:

"When a man turns to Christ and seems to be getting on pretty well (in the sense that some of his bad habits are now corrected), he often feels that it would now be natural if things went fairly smoothly. When troubles come along - illnesses, money troubles, new kinds of temptation - he is disappointed. These things, he feels, might have been necessary to rouse him and make him repent in his bad old days; but why now? Because God is forcing him on up, to a higher level: putting him into situations where he will have to be very much braver, or more patient, or more loving, than he ever dreamed of before. It seems to us all unnecessary: but that is because we have not yet not the slightest notion of the tremendous thing He means to make of us." (Mere Christianity, 174).

There is no end in our quest to be delivered from the struggles of our mortal condition, as Nephi reminds us by exclaiming:

"Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul. Do not anger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions. Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation. O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul? Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin? May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my heart is broken and my spirit is contrite! O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may walk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road! O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy righteousness! O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine enemies! Wilt thou make my path straight before me! Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way — but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy.
"O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever. I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his trust in the arm of flesh. Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm. Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I ask not amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen." (2 Nephi 4:28-35).

I pray we may reach a little higher, try a little harder, be a little more understanding and patient with others, in short, to be a little more kind and solicitous of the needs of those around us. As we reach upward and outside ourselves, we discover our tendencies to sin because of our mortal weakness become less distracting.

My Top 5 List of Things To Be Grateful For

Every year at this time I think about why I love Thanksgiving more than any other holiday in the calendar. It's always been a chance to sit down and take stock of the year as it quickly passes away. This year is no exception. We have so much to be grateful for, and I can always think of more than my top five because it's a very long list. But for 2014, here are my top five:

Ashley, Dianne, Patsy, Peggy

1. My mother-in-law, Peggy Ruth Brazier Hewlett Weight. Yes, at the top of my list this year I have ranked my mother-in-law. She recently passed away after almost 93 years on the planet. But I am not grateful she passed away. Rather, I am grateful for the long legacy of faith she represents to me and all her posterity. I am grateful for all the happy memories she has given us. I am grateful to her for living in such a way that we all learned valuable life lessons of repentance, forgiveness, diligence, hard work and dedication. Legion are the examples of people, family and otherwise, who were welcomed to her home when they were in town for visits. She was always the "hostess with the mostess."

By the world's standards, this would seem an odd choice at the top of a list of things for which I am grateful, but in my case none of the standard mother-in-law jokes apply. Peggy was world-class in essentially all the things that matter most in mothers and human beings in general. She was a consummate networker and connector of people. She had so many friends, even after such a long life, that the chapel for her funeral was filled to overflowing and back into the cultural hall. Never underestimate the impact of being a good friend. Indeed, nearly all her posterity and everyone who knew her thought they were her favorite. What capacity for making people feel special and valued!

I first became aware of Peggy when her son Lin was killed by a drunk driver when I was a junior at East High School. Lin was a senior and Patsy was a sophomore. I watched their family grieve over Lin's death, along with the whole student body. I was at the cemetery in October, 1963, when Lin and his friend Flemming Christensen were laid to rest fifty-one years ago. As I stood over the open grave the other day to dedicate Peggy's final resting place, the memory of Lin's and Flemming's funerals came rushing back. Now the circle of life was complete, and the glorious reunion that was taking place on the other side of the veil was revealed clearly to me and all the rest of us.

Peggy and Harold were role models of applying the atonement's principles to their lives, and they became diligent missionaries wherever in the world they went. Eventually, they would travel to the far corners of the earth, touching foot on every continent except Antarctica. Her son John sang "O That I Were an Angel," as a final tribute to her at her funeral, and when I thought of Lin and Flemming doing missionary work in the spirit world for fifty-one years before she joined them there, I was thrilled at the prospect of her wish finally coming true! How grateful I am for the knowledge of the plan of salvation that has been revealed in these last days.

2. I am grateful for her daughter, Patsy. I don't think there is a more compassionate and loving woman on earth than Patsy. She has spent the last several weeks at her mother's side both in the rehab center and the hospital. Peggy fell and broke her hip about seven weeks ago. It proved to be a game changer, and accelerated her demise. Until that event, we had all thought Peggy to be invincible. At the peril of her own health, something I have been worried about, Patsy pressed on in service to her mother, ignoring her own well-being. I insisted that she go to see the doctor this week after all the events of her mother's passing were complete, and as I was writing this post they called from the doctor's office to give an alarming report about Patsy's anemic condition, something that has been a lifelong challenge for her but has been exacerbated by the events of the past several weeks. We spent the rest of the day in the emergency room until well into the night, while they transfused her with two units of blood.

We never know when or how life will end. There are no guarantees, no extended lease terms on life. Our sojourn here on earth has an expiration date, we just don't have that information. I am grateful for each day I have with this remarkable woman, knowing factors beyond our control may overtake us someday. When I think about why Patsy has a lifelong pattern of little or no sleep at night and seems to be so focused on the needs and comforts of others ahead of her own, I need look no further than the example she saw in her mother for the answer.

At Merilee's wedding reception, summer 2014 

3. I am grateful for all our children and grandchildren. In our family we don't make distinctions about in-laws. They are all ours, and we count them that way. When we were counting up grandchildren of Peggy's we included all the spouses of our children in the count, and we were instructed that's not an accurate count. Peggy never believed that - she always sided with our way of counting. So, when the program for the memorial service was being prepared I listed everyone as though they all belonged to Peggy and Harold, because they do without reservation. One well wisher in a card to Patsy after the funeral, summed it up best:

"Your dear mother was loved by so many! She brought a lot of happiness and joy, especially to her grandchildren. They have expressed so many great things about their experiences with her. Her family was so important to her, her friends loved her, and she always was full of life!
"You were so fortunate to have had her in your life for so many years. Her zest for life, her love of family was so evident.
"Patsy, know I love you, you have so many wonderful traits of your mother."

4. The knowledge I have of the atonement of Jesus Christ and the plan of salvation. That testimony anchors our existence here in mortality. He suffered for each of us. As the only Sinless One, He took upon Himself our sins and our afflictions. There is nothing in this mortal experience He does not know and understand intimately. In a way I do not fully understand, He knew us in Gethsemane and on Golgotha. He knew about all the sins we committed, and He knew about all the wrongs that were inflicted upon us by others, and He forgave everyone who has ever afflicted another and been afflicted. I am thankful I share that knowledge with Peggy.

On the back of the program for her memorial service, we printed a written testimony she offered when she and Harold were serving as missionaries in Ireland. We found it among her papers as we were preparing for her funeral:

"Today is Mother's Day in the United States, and I am missing my beautiful children and grandchildren.
"My heart is overflowing with gratitude to my Heavenly Father for these beautiful children and grandchildren.
"The privilege of partnership with God in bearing and nurturing His children has been the greatest blessing of my life!
"I thank my Father in Heaven for noble heritage, ancestors who pulled handcarts across wonderful country, parents and brothers who love me and taught me to love the Lord, wonderful friends and associates.
"I am so grateful for a fine and noble husband to love me and care for me.
"I am grateful for gospel callings and teachings, for the Holy Spirit to lead, to warn, to strengthen and to comfort me.
"I believe in Christ. I love him with all my heart. I know His power."

5. I am thankful for a blanket of white that now covers Pine Valley. Last night ten inches of snow fell and all the trees are now cloaked in white that sparkles with a brightness beyond description. I said to Patsy as we drove down the road to our three-hour block of meetings this morning, "This is the most beautiful scene imaginable. The winter presents some challenges to overcome, but if you love white this is the place to be." Whenever the Utah ski resorts get a big winter storm before Thanksgiving, it bodes well for the tourist trade in these parts and the water reserves for next summer. We can be thankful for water content in snow.

White is such a remarkable and consistent gospel symbol. We dress in white clothing to go to the temple to participate in all the ordinances of salvation. We are all dressed alike. There is no class distinction there. When Peggy was lying in her casket at her viewings, her white temple dress was the one she selected and told Patsy, "This is the dress I want you to bury me in." In life she was beautiful and arrayed in spotless white when she attended the temple with us, and in death she was translucent, appearing to be at peace in her restful repose and twenty years younger than her 92-plus years.

Babies are blessed in white. Brides are dressed in white. A white shirt is the "priesthood uniform" for boys and men alike. White is the color for all participants in a baptismal service. Often, though not mandated, white bread is the symbol for the sacrament. We wash our garments in the blood of Christ through His atonement, and when we do we are told we are made "spotless white."

And now in the Salt Lake City Cemetery, alongside her beloved Lin, the graves are covered in a fresh blanket of white.

Hope and Peace After Divorce

This morning I was reminded of this statement attributed to Pierre Teilhard de Chardin: "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience."

In the course of my daily walk through this mortal probation, I encounter many who are surfeited by the demands and challenges they face. Too often, they tell me, they became "lost" in the day to day routines of life without focusing on their spiritual well-being. Instead of keeping Chardin's perspective, their human experience overwhelmed them.

Many with whom I interact are the products of the divorce of their parents. Now in their own marriages, they are sometimes persuaded it might be easier to take the same course of their parents. They give up. They choose alternative lifestyles. What once began as a blissful knot-tying in sacred precincts where holy vows of allegiance to one another were pronounced, marriage for them descended into depths of sin, disobedience, indifference, abuse, addiction and anger.

Often what happens in these situations is mortal forgetfulness. We forget our spiritual identity as an eternal son or daughter of God. Of course, some of it is unavoidable because there is a veil of forgetfulness drawn across our minds and spirits when we are born. Brigham Young said in simplest terms of explanation the veil was our physical body shrouding our eternal spirit.

I am aware of three current cases of divorce. None is a happy outcome right now. The challenge before the individuals involved puts them on a path to choose - either they will become better for the experience, or they will become bitter.

The confusion when divorce of parents is the final outcome is palpable. "What will become of me if my parents divorce?" some ask. Can a child whose parents divorce still claim the blessings of the sealing? Are they still "born under the covenant?" To whom will they be sealed if both parents remarry? These are but a few of the questions that arise. And then when repentance is in evidence later on, the aftermath of the divorce presents opportunities to learn to forgive those who inflicted so much pain. Along the way there are hidden nuggets of gold waiting to be discovered for the earnest seeker of truth.

I am not an expert on divorce. Just the opposite. Mine has been a blissful marriage of harmony and shared goals through all the ups and downs of life. It has not been without challenges. It has been anything but smooth sailing. But who's complaining? It's what we signed up for, isn't it?

However, I found a statement by a woman who divorced after several years of marriage and went through eight years of litigation thereafter. She provides a valuable perspective. Said she: "When I told my family I was writing about peace after divorce, they laughed and said, 'Tell them there isn't any!' I'm not telling you that. There is peace. Peace after divorce comes in the process of living. It happens after learning hard lessons. It occurs over time alongside family, friends, and professionals who care. It happens privately but also with many others who share the experience and understand. Peace emerges from pain and accompanies healing. It comes from confronting and accepting truth, from being willing to live and love and forgive and move forward. Divorce is still hard to say, but it has not closed the gate on my own path to life, love, and peace." (Elaine Shaw Sorensen, "Peace After Divorce," in Women in the Covenant of Grace by Susette Fletcher Green and Dawn Hall Anderson, 50).

Detours in our mortal journey are inevitable, and they take many forms. No matter how long or difficult the road may seem, our past cannot hold us prisoner to our future unless we choose it. I have seen many who have overcome the oppression of the past and set their sails for the future voyage with satisfying results. In one case, a woman whose husband was plagued by alcohol addiction for years found a new job that supplied her with the income she needed to raise and support her four children. Life went on for her and her children, and they are happy today because of their choices.

Said another: "A marriage is a commitment between two people that is designed to last for eternity. One person cannot carry that commitment to fruition alone. When it is not being upheld by both parties, it ceases to be eternal. It requires dedication on both sides to make it valid. A hopeless marriage need not be forever; an abusive situation need not be tolerated. You can still have worth as a person with an unsuccessful marriage. My marriage ceased being eternal years before we entered the divorce courts." (Nedra Hardy, "When a Marriage Is Not Celestial," ibid., 55).

The antidote for dealing with the devastation of divorce is the same I would offer for all life's problems. My life took a detour financially a few years ago. I wish things had turned out differently than they did. Instead of financial security I was seeking, I was escorted back to square one to begin again. It was humbling. I've detailed it in previous posts. I am fortunate to have found a surprisingly fulfilling work life since the debacle of the world's financial meltdown in 2008. I am reminded of a talk title from Hugh Nibley, "Work we must, but the lunch is free." 

During that time I prayed, I fasted, I petitioned, and along the way there were undeniable moments of fears, doubts and frustrations. But those proved to be only punctuation marks in a chapter of my life filled with overwhelming love, assurances and support from my wife and children. Because we could call upon God, our eternal partner in our marriage, ours was a marriage that didn't break under the stress. He carried us and sustained us with grace and charity. I am grateful every day for that reality.

Don't get trapped for too long in your "pity party." Half the people out there don't care what happened to you, and the other half think you got what you deserved. Be happy, keep smiling through the pain. It will get better when you take action, even if it's only tiny baby steps to start in a new direction.

President Thomas S. Monson

Now, as I move along through life, I have discovered success comes from small and seemingly insignificant choices. We learn lessons, we grow, we mature in spiritual things, and what happens "in the thick of thin things" pales by comparison. We learn to love and serve others when we are afflicted. Turning outward to help others has long been the recipe President Thomas S. Monson recommends. We learn to love vegetables and fruit instead of a steady diet of Peanut M&Ms.

Each marriage is filled with tests. Whether marriage ends or goes on, what makes the difference is how we choose. And the choice is always ours. It really doesn't matter what our parents did before us, or our spouses who may choose poorly. We are free to make of our lives what we will. And with a little bit of work we can usually figure out how to do it better together than apart.

And we can be at peace with God's spirit, no matter what comes our way.

True Happiness

Patsy Hewlett Goates

A voice hath spoken from the dust,
Its message pure, without alloy,
Of treasured hope and sacred trust:
Oh, "men are that they might have joy."

Should sorrow come, we'll not despair,
For He would not that men should pine.
The grief that comes we'll learn to bear
Until again the sun doth shine.

Before the Lord, then, humbly go.
His message will our spirits buoy.
On us his blessings he'll bestow,
For "men are that they might have joy." (Hymns, no. 275)

"Adam fell that man might be; and men are, that they might have joy.
"And the Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he may redeem the children of men from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon, save it be by the punishment of the law at the great and last day, according to the commandments which God hath given.
"Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. "And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself.
"And now, my sons, I would that ye should look to the great Mediator, and hearken unto his great commandments; and be faithful unto his words, and choose eternal life, according to the will of his Holy Spirit." (2 Nephi 2:25-28, emphasis mine).

Two years ago I was writing near this same day in the calendar, and I thought I was happy then. There is nothing to compare with the joy of a righteous posterity, which gives me the title for today's post. Two years ago our youngest daughter, Merilee, was preparing to leave to serve as a missionary in the Washington DC South Mission. Little did we know then what we know today about the impact that decision to serve a mission would have upon her life and ours.

While serving there, she met and worked with many, many missionaries. She was the first Sister Trainer Leader called when that new position was implemented, putting sister missionaries for the first time in the zone leader council meetings in missions throughout the world. She had the opportunity to serve many missionaries as the age limit was lowered to encourage more to serve.

President Ronald A. Rasband

We are informed by President Ronald A. Rasband, Senior President of the Seventy who now resides in our ward, that the number of full-time missionaries is expected to top out around 91,000 this fall sometime. As a result of that surge of missionaries, Merilee's mission was split and the southern boundary of their mission was swallowed up in a new mission.

Out of the Washington DC South Mission and into that new mission was transferred one of the Assistants to President Matt Riggs, Elder Michael Litchfield. They would not see each other again until after their missions. Returning within a week of each other, he to Washington state and Merilee to Utah, they began to commiserate through e-mails about how difficult their adjustment back to "normal life" seemed to each of them. Merilee suggested he come to Utah to seek employment and continue his education. You know, that's what friends do for each other.

Merilee and Michael

Within days (not weeks), he came to Utah, found a job in the same company where she was working, and by Christmas Eve it was apparent this relationship had flourished and prospered beyond their fleeting friendship as missionaries who had "locked their hearts" from any and all thoughts of anything but missionary work. Their relationship had been forged initially based upon their shared respect and admiration for each other as missionaries. Imagine his delight when they called President Riggs to inform him they had officially "unlocked their hearts" and planned to be married! Because of their missions, both Michael and Merilee have now "sealed their hearts" for each other and each chose an eternal companion for themselves neither may have considered without that mission experience.

True happiness in this life consists of one thing - obtaining a body. That was Joseph Smith's simplest answer when asked. Said he: "The great principle of happiness consists in having a body." (TPJS, 181.) In another place, he continued: "Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God." (Ibid., 255). Further, the Lord revealed, "This is my work and my glory - to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39).We are spirit creations of God, and the mortal parents of children are partners with God in the creation process.

All the bodies that have been born on this planet and myriads of others like it have one thing in common: Physical bodies are the result of a man and a woman who procreate to open the door to mortality. A married couple must bring to pass the mortality of man and woman first before there can be any thoughts of immortality and eternal life. The single state is impotent and devoid of the power to procreate. The patriarchal order of the priesthood is meaningless without matriarchs. Kings cannot be kings without a Queen. Priests cannot be priests without a Priestess. There is no other way children are born except where medical science has been enabled to offer an "assist".

President Ezra Taft Benson

I think then-Elder Ezra Taft Benson sums up my feelings. His words are my words:

"When the God of heaven said it was our responsibility to multiply and replenish the earth, that marriage was primarily for that purpose, he didn't insert any provisos.

"So, my brothers and sisters, think seriously about these things. Pray about them. Fast about them. The Lord will give you the answer because he wants you to succeed. He wants you to be happy. He wants you to have the blessings of righteous posterity. Sometimes marriage may be postponed to the point where for physical and other reasons parenthood is denied. Oh, what a loss when the time comes! Children are jewels. Blessed is the man or the woman who has a family of children. The deepest joys and blessings in life are associated with family — parenthood — sacrifice. It's worth any sacrifice, practically, in order to have those sweet spirits come into your home and to come early, that you might enjoy them for a longer period; that they might enjoy their parents for a longer period; and that their children might enjoy their grandparents for a longer period.

"May I again assure you that the Lord wants you to be happy. He wants you to be successful. He wants you to be good citizens of this great country. But above all, he wants you to live so that you will be exalted in the celestial kingdom of God. The door is open. The plan is here. The authority and the power is here. It's up to you. If we live according to that plan, we'll be happy; we'll be successful; we'll love this country and be good citizens of it; and we will be exalted in the celestial kingdom." (Delivered at Washington Stake M Men and Gleaner Fireside, March 28, 1954, reprinted in So Shall Ye Reap, Reed A. Benson, Ezra Taft Benson, 1960, 190-91,emphasis mine).

Let us therefore rejoice and be happy in the eternal marriage covenant. We find joy in the eternal family unit. All other forms of happiness are transitory and fleeting. True happiness is found in the family, and I am so thankful for each who contributes in my life to that fullness of joy.

Family Reunion 2013 (several missing)