Out with the Old, and In with the New

As one of our Christmas traditions, we design and print a new tee-shirt that has some family significance for The Goates Kids. This year, as always, the tee-shirts were opened on Christmas Eve and are usually put to use that first night as pajama tops.

This year was typical, and in the design process with everyone's name printed on the back, I counted the grandchildren (it's a task in our family). With the recent birth this week of Clara Grace, we now have 38 grandchildren with two more expected in the next three months.

There is something wonderfully energizing and exciting about the birth of grandchildren. Maybe it's because Patsy and I no longer have to do the "heavy lifting." She's up in Washington state this week tending grandchildren. It's her thing to be a Grandma. She's almost as good at it as she has been being a mother. Nothing gives me greater joy than watching her in that role.

It was Carl Sandburg who famously said: "A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on."

A baby, like a new year, is a fresh beginning. We are reminded in scripture:

Man was also in the beginning with God. Intelligence, or the light of truth, was not created or made, neither indeed can be.
All truth is independent in that sphere in which God has placed it, to act for itself, as all intelligence also; otherwise there is no existence.
Behold, here is the agency of man, and here is the condemnation of man; because that which was from the beginning is plainly manifest unto them, and they receive not the light.
And every man whose spirit receiveth not the light is under condemnation.
For man is spirit. The elements are eternal, and spirit and element, inseparably connected, receive a fulness of joy;
And when separated, man cannot receive a fulness of joy.
The elements are the tabernacle of God; yea, man is the tabernacle of God, even temples; and whatsoever temple is defiled, God shall destroy that temple.
The glory of God is intelligence, or, in other words, light and truth.
Light and truth forsake that evil one.
Every spirit of man was innocent in the beginning; and God having redeemed man from the fall, men became again, in their infant state, innocent before God. (D&C 93:29-38).

Melanie, the mother of our newest grand-daughter, reminded me last night that everyone walking around on planet Earth today was birthed in the same way as her new infant. Everyone, think of it!, everyone has a mother, and we owe them our lives. I revere my mother, and my memories of her are as real and fresh as if she were still living here among us. Strange that such a common experience doesn't bond us all together as a human family, isn't it? So universal, this matter of birth and death, yet we take it so much for granted that we discount the miraculous nature of it.

We are commanded to "bring up your children in light and truth." (D&C 93:40). These precious innocent children are given to us as a gift, but also as an inheritance. The same blessings promised to Abraham in God's covenant with him are universal to all Abraham's posterity, if we will live for them:

My name is Jehovah, and I know the end from the beginning; therefore my hand shall be over thee.
And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee above measure, and make thy name great among all nations, and thou shalt be a blessing unto thy seed after thee, that in their hands they shall bear this ministry and Priesthood unto all nations;
And I will bless them through thy name; for as many as receive this Gospel shall be called after thy name, and shall be accounted thy seed, and shall rise up and bless thee, as their father;
And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse them that curse thee; and in thee (that is, in thy Priesthood) and in thy seed (that is, thy Priesthood), for I give unto thee a promise that this right shall continue in thee, and in thy seed after thee (that is to say, the literal seed, or the seed of the body) shall all the families of the earth be blessed, even with the blessings of the Gospel, which are the blessings of salvation, even of life eternal. (Abraham 2:8-11).

All the families of the earth today are being blessed by the seed of Abraham, as the fulness of the gospel spreads forth across the world. Whatever sins of the past have been committed in violation of the agency that has been ours since the foundations of this world were first laid, even since we were first organized as "intelligences," can be swept away in repentance. All that is required of God's children, then, now and always, is the recognition of Christ's atoning redemption for each of us.

The beginning of a new year is a renewal of life, a chance to begin again, to forsake past sins and bad habits, and to cast out the old way we've done things, and to bring in the new. Indeed, the meaning of repentance in Greek translations is literally "to think differently after." Are you capable of doing things differently next year after witnessing the disastrous results of this past year that have brought sorrow to yourselves and others? Can you think differently? Can you act differently? Robert Louis Stevenson said, "You cannot run away from weakness. You must sometime fight it out or perish. And if that be so, why not now and where you stand?" According to King Benjamin, your salvation depends upon your ability to be consciously aware of your need to change:

And finally, I cannot tell you all the things whereby ye may commit sin; for there are divers ways and means, even so many that I cannot number them.
But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not. (Mosiah 4:29-30).

The birth of a child symbolizes perfectly our individual and collective preparations for one day living in a Zion society. Indeed, the birth of Zion is prefaced and likened to a woman bringing forth a baby and enduring the travail of her labor pains to produce the birth. Becoming Zion-like begins with each of us and following the example of Abraham. To inherit what Abraham has inherited is the quest of a lifetime of righteous living and doing.

There are some who subscribe to the satanic notion that the world is such a wicked place it is irresponsible to bring more children in to it. Could it be possibly as wicked a place as it was in Abraham's day when children were being routinely sacrificed on a pagan altar? Satan came into this world in the garden with the sole purpose of destroying the family. His inroads are deep and he has had great success since then. He will always have an opponent among the Latter-day Saints, however, who believe the family is at the center of the universe because God designed the plan of happiness in such a way we could all participate in the joy of creation.

So on the eve of another new year, let us all put away the old and begin afresh.

Let us make a pact that we will resist believing all the political punditry coming from the prophets of doom and gloom who are predicting the end of America. We will hear it in a cascading cacophony of escalating decibels all next year in the run-up to the November presidential election. The Iowa caucuses kick things off next week. At this writing, no one has a clue how Iowa will conclude until all the votes are counted, and so it will be state by state until the final election on the second Tuesday in November.

Let us agree to do all we can and dial down the false predictions, since no one really knows until all the votes are in. No matter what you think is going to happen this next year, God's promises and His plan for the establishment of Zion in the last days extend far beyond the here and now. These promises resound in my ears:

I have sworn, and the decree hath gone forth by a former commandment which I have given unto you, that I would let fall the sword of mine indignation in behalf of my people; and even as I have said, it shall come to pass.
Mine indignation is soon to be poured out without measure upon all nations; and this will I do when the cup of their iniquity is full.
And in that day all who are found upon the watch-tower, or in other words, all mine Israel, shall be saved.
And they that have been scattered shall be gathered.
And all they who have mourned shall be comforted.
And all they who have given their lives for my name shall be crowned.
Therefore, let your hearts be comforted concerning Zion; for all flesh is in mine hands; be still and know that I am God.
Zion shall not be moved out of her place, notwithstanding her children are scattered.
They that remain, and are pure in heart, shall return, and come to their inheritances, they and their children, with songs of everlasting joy, to build up the waste places of Zion —
And all these things that the prophets might be fulfilled. (D&C 101:10-19).

Six Principles: Mothers and The Patriarchal Order

Recently, I was in a conversation with someone (don't even recall who it was), who expressed surprise when I stated in answer to his question that the ordinances associated with exaltation were to be received only by a husband and wife simultaneously, not separately. His assumption had always been that our ultimate salvation was strictly an individual matter.

On this Mothers' Day weekend, it seems appropriate to underscore the role of women in our lives as men. We simply have no hope of eternal life without being sealed to a woman of our choosing. Period. No exceptions. No other way. The happiness and fulfillment of the mother of your children must always be your highest and most urgent need. You may not always succeed. My experience has been how patient my wife has always been with my blundered attempts, but because she is rarely content with even my best effort I am always reaching higher than I would otherwise. I have written extensively about these core doctrines in the past. It's there for all who want to see it.

Joseph Smith

The clearest statement made to understand the shared divine nature of the patriarchal order was first uttered by Joseph Smith. Said he, "[The patriarch order] is the kingdom of an endless life." He added: "The sacrifice required of Abraham in the offering up of Isaac shows that if a man would attain to the keys of the kingdom of an endless life, he must sacrifice all things." (HC, 5:555). This eternal kingdom in which each worthy man could receive the keys referred to by the Prophet begins in mortality, and extends to "a fulness of the priesthood" based upon several key principles. I will cite only six as follows:

First, the highest expression of sexuality is God's work and we are partners with Him as husbands and wives. We are the mortal means by which He continually increases in glory "to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39).

Second, the only way in which our Father in Heaven can attain His full potential as an exalted being in this eternal family, is to provide a way for men and women to be organized first as personages of spirit, then secondly, tabernacled in a body of flesh and bones and endowed with the full glory and power of the Man of Holiness. Inherent in that ultimate bestowal of glory and power is the power to procreate children in the resurrection and to develop glory in them through the same divine plan. Creation of life requires a male and a female component.

Third, before the individual members of the Church could become like the exalted Man of Holiness in every way, they had to be organized into an eternal family order. The Father and His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, effected that organization. This eternal family was a continuous, on-going priesthood organization called the divine patriarchal order. Before this earth upon which we now live was formed, the order came down by generation from God through Adam and his sons and their successive generations. Each ordinance given as part of the order was established as a dynamic, life-giving function. Through these ordinances, men and women could acquire divine attributes and powers of life through the Holy Spirit. The symbolic elements of gospel ordinances mirrored actual experiences of birth, death, the atonement, and the resurrection.

Fourth, the saints of the last days living in the dispensation of the fulness of times were required to master Zion's economic and social programs and, in time before the Second Coming, establish the government of God in their midst in observance of the laws associated with the divine patriarchal order.

Fifth, by applying the principles and laws of the gospel in their lives, the saints could have their "callings and elections made sure" in family relationships begun here on earth at the altars of the temple in the patriarchal order in eternity. We were all taught in the pre-existence and in our family units here on earth that only in this way could we eventually become priests and kings (and priestesses and queens) in the celestial order in eternity. The power to seal here on earth is held only by the living prophet and president of the Church. (See Millenial Star, 5:151, [March, 1845]; also see D&C 132:7).

Sixth, when the saints apply celestial law and are united as heirs with the greater eternal family in the presence of God, they will receive a fulness of the priesthood and be made recipients of the glory exalted beings possess, to the degree the saints were able to receive and apply it to their good.

Brigham Young, expanding on what he had learned from Joseph Smith, would later state:

"When the Holy Priesthood, which is after the order of the Son of God, is upon the earth, and its organizations, ordinances, gospel, powers, authorities and blessings, are enjoyed by the children of men; then by means of sealing powers and keys, and an everlasting covenant, the sons of men become the sons of God by regeneration, and are entitled, every man in his order, to the privileges, exaltations, principalities and powers, kingdoms and thrones, which are held and enjoyed, by the Great Father of our race: and all these are obtained through the law of natural increase, and the saving of that which the Father puts in our power." (JD, 10:355).

Adam and Eve were the prototypes on this earth:

"The Lord administered comfort unto Adam, and said unto him: 'I have set thee to be at the head -- a multitude of nations shall come of thee, and thou art a prince over them forever.'" So, in like manner, every faithful couple joined by priesthood authority in a provisional sealing ordinance becomes the Adam and Eve to the race that springs from their loins, when they are embraced in the covenants and blessings of the Holy Priesthood; and in the lapse of eternity, and in the progress of eternal lives, every true son and daughter of God becomes a king of kings, a queen of queens; a priest and a priestess. (Ibid.)

Heber C. Kimball

Reality being what it is, the final patriarchal order was not to be fully realized in mortality. Heber C. Kimball reported a vision given to Joseph Smith in which "he saw Adam open the gate of the celestial city and admit the people one by one. He then saw Father Adam conduct them to the throne one by one, when they were crowned Kings and Priests of God." (JD, 9:41).

President Brigham Young

Brigham Young agreed:

"We have not yet received our kingdoms, neither will we, until we have finished our work on the earth, passed through the ordeals, are brought up by the power of the resurrection, and are crowned with glory and eternal lives. Then he that has overcome and is found worthy, will be made a king of kings, and lord of lords over his own posterity, or in other words: A father of fathers. This latter rendering, is more strictly in accordance with the original text." (Ibid., 10:355).

All of this is consistent with what should be obvious -- without mothers there would be no fathers, and with neither there would be no procreation or hope for exaltation.

People question why the leaders of the Church today are so persistent in their adamant stance against the false doctrines associated with the LGBT community and their political agenda to legalize gay marriage. Some even maintain when all those old men finally get it right and so-called "scientific proofs" are studied more in depth, there will be a change in Church policy. Don't bet the farm on that. In light of the eternal verities associated with revelation from the very beginning, a change in doctrine is not likely to ever be equated with a change in policy.

One cannot accept the premise we are led by living prophets, and simultaneously embrace the notion that someday a change in doctrine to accommodate modern politically correct dogma will be allowed to destroy the very foundation upon which the kingdom of God has been established in eternities that predate and will succeed ours.

The need for sympathy and acceptance is acknowledged. Diversity, compassion and understanding is never out of date in the Church. That said, do not be persuaded by those who suggest the leaders of the Church are simply politically incorrect or out of step with the times in which we live. They understand perfectly the ramifications for evil that such false postulations invite, and teach what they do so we may not be deceived by the sophistries of the day.

Mothers -- in particular the one to whom I am linked -- have done what they came here to do under divine command from the beginning: "to fill the measure of their creation" by creating life with their husbands. Once each faithful couple has ascended step by step through parenthood, the remaining steps crown their efforts with godhood:

"They then would want that more sure word of prophecy, that they were sealed in the heavens and had the promise of eternal life in the kingdom of God. Then, having this promise sealed unto them, it was an anchor to the soul, sure and steadfast. Though the thunders might roll and lightnings flash, and earthquakes bellow, and war gather thick around, yet this hope and knowledge would support the soul in every hour of trial, trouble and tribulation. Then knowledge through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is the grand key that unlocks the glories and mysteries of the kingdom of heaven.

"Compare this principle once with Christendom at the present day, and where are they, with all their boasted religion, piety and sacredness while at the same time they are crying out against prophets, apostles, angels, revelations, prophesying and visions, etc. Why, they are just ripening for the damnation of hell. They will be damned, for they reject the most glorious principle of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and treat with disdain and trample under foot the key that unlocks the heavens and puts in our possession the glories of the celestial world. Yes, I say, such will be damned, with all their professed godliness. Then I would exhort you to go on and continue to call upon God until you make your calling and sure for yourselves, by obtaining this more sure word of prophecy, and wait patiently for the promise until you obtain it, etc." (TPJS, 298).

Ah, Joseph Smith -- just not much ambiguity there. I'm guessing President Boyd K. Packer is simply being true to the true prophet in this dispensation.

Part and parcel of our mortal probation is learning to distinguish good from evil. In our eagerness to embrace the downtrodden, the falsely judged and even the most ardent sinners, let us never be deceived into believing that tolerance can cross the line into open opposition against the humble prophets of God and the doctrine they lovingly declare, as if from the Lord's own mouth. (See D&C 21:5).

On this Mothers' Day, give thanks for the righteous women in your life as men. There is no greater gift than being surrounded by the righteousness of good women. God intended us to rub off all the "pointy and prickly parts" of our character against each other in the marriage relationship. I guess it's the only way He could devise to prepare us for eternal life. Be happy in all the twists and turns that don't work out quite the way you drew them up on the chalkboard of all your planning.

Always remember and don't forget -- there is a priceless legacy a righteous woman offers you as a man you can obtain nowhere else and in no other way. It is eternal life.

Helen Lee Goates: A Retrospective at 85

Lee Family (l to r) Fern, Helen, Maurine, Harold

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  It's also the anniversary of my mother's 85th birthday.  She passed away in April, 2000.  She was 74 years old, and we celebrated a Thanksgiving Day birthday at her home in 1999, where she was surrounded by family.  We held her funeral the day before Easter, 2000.  Flowers were blooming, spring was in the air, and the promise of life's renewal was everywhere present. 

Since then, I've been gently cajoled several times to write something in tribute to her life.  I've deferred far too long.  Today seems like a good time to tickle the keyboard of my laptop and reminisce a bit.  Bear with me, please.

Mom was the second daughter of Harold B. Lee and Fern Lucinda Tanner Lee.  She was born on November 25, 1925.  They had two daughters and Auntie Mar was the elder of the two.  As a result they were a close family.  Mom and Auntie Mar learned how to play the violin and piano respectively, and during the years they grew up were constantly sharing their talents with others.  They played together in every single Mormon chapel in Salt Lake City in those years.

My memories of my childhood begin and end with our shared times with the Wilkins cousins.  It seems every holiday was spent with them.  Those two sisters were inseparable and so were we as their children.  They lived in Provo, we lived in Salt Lake.  The BYUtah rivalry was played out in backyards and driveways with hoops in both cities in every sport as we grew up.  It was mostly innocent fun, not nearly as "life and death" as it seems to be nowadays.  The saddest time of all was the parting -- we begged for "trading cousins" every time.

My mother was an exceptional homemaker.  I'm not certain how the divine plan worked the way it did.  These two exceptional mothers, daughters of a prophet, were saddled with eight boys among them and only two daughters -- one for each.  That they patiently bore our schemes and antics as boys is remarkable, since neither had much experience with boys until we came along.  Jane and Martsy, however, became the embodiment of their respective mothers.  They were the leaven in the lumps of clay -- the older and younger brothers who tormented them.  We might justly take at least some credit for the way they both turned out.  They are angels, polished and burnished in the rough and tumble of obnoxious brothers, no doubt.

Mom was resigned at some point, I suppose, to the need for help around the house.  As her oldest son, I was shown the finer points of homemaking.  That included washing windows, scrubbing floors, cleaning toilet bowls, sinks, bathtubs and showers, vacuuming and even ironing sheets!  Her philosphy, instilled within me at an early age was to always leave things better than I found them.  That carried over into my work in my career and the Church, and even when I was in airplane restrooms.  I always heard that little voice, "Leave it better than you found it," which included cleaning the basin and the small counter so it would be better for the next person.  Back in the day before "permapress" was invented she had a roller iron contraption and taught me how to iron the bedsheets by feeding them into the jaws of the hot iron pressed against the roller, controlled by foot pedals and hand controls.  It was an interesting invention to have to master, but we boys did it in turn.  Taking the wrinkles out with that flat iron gave one the sense of accomplishment and measurable improvement.  It was a lifelong lesson in satisfaction for having done something to improve the way I found it.

We had a "Behavior Record" that was posted on a prominent cupboard in the kitchen for all to see.  "Good marks" were scored at the top of the list, moving down -- 1 through 10 -- each week.  A brief description was written by Mom.  "Bad marks" were scored from the bottom up, blacking out the numbers and subtracting a penny for each "bad mark" registered.  That's how the allowances were paid, and of course, because Mom was the sole adjudicator of what was right and wrong in our home during the day, Dad was able to ascertain by a quick glance at the "scorecard" how well his sons were treating their mother and their siblings.  It wasn't always a pretty picture.

At home night on Monday evening the pennies were counted out.  For extra good behavior noted during the week a subjective star was awarded beside the measured good work, and sometimes for extra, extra good behavior two stars were awarded.  In the early stages the stars were worth nickels.  It was good to be good in our house!  As inflation ravaged the assumptions through the years, the stakes increased from pennies to nickels to dimes and quarters.  Remember, a Three Musketeers candy bar was only 5 cents!  I remember some adults talking about the end of the world when the price of candy bars got bumped to 10 cents!  Tithing lessons were taught early and often, and only the brightest, shiniest pennies were fit for tithing.

I loved reading with Mom at night.  We had a tradition called "Night up with Mother."  That meant in rotation one child got to stay up later than the other siblings and read with Mom.  She was a reading advocate when reading just wasn't that cool and there weren't any contests at school.  We read the classics.  She had a collection of books from which we read, including the Iliad and the Odyssey by Homer (among others) that remain among my treasured memories with her.  Mark Twain, Robert Louis Stevenson, J. M. Barrie, Robert Frost, even Mary Mapes and Charles Lutwidge Dodgson (Lewis Carroll) made the "play list."  The theater of the mind, as a result, is still more visual and valid to me than the movie or television screen, even though I was a child of the sixties raised on TV.

Perhaps my favorite part of the hot summer days was "Quiet Time," another Helen Lee Goates tradition.  She passed it off as a necessity to somehow stop the spread of polio.  I've never seen any authentication for that imperative medical prophylactic, but somehow she sold it to us as valid.  At any rate, we were called home in the heat of the day to pick up a book of our choosing and spend an hour in the shade reading.  I loved it.  I learned to love reading because of my Mother's invitations.

Mom was the perfect "ying" to Dad's "yang."  They complemented each other well.  Dad was the consummate hospital administrator and Church leader, gone from home a lot during those years, while Mom was the vigilant stay-at-home Mom -- always on scene and ever-present in our lives.  I became, she told me later, her confidant when Dad wasn't there to discuss whatever was troubling her that day.  It may be the origins of cooking up sibling strategies to keep two younger brothers in line, as she enlisted my support for her mothering.  I hope by now they've both forgiven my zeal for that assignment.  Before automatic dishwashers were in vogue, we would often do the dishes together -- she washed and I dried and we talked.  I'm not certain I had much wisdom to impart, but she told me years later what a good listener I had become.  If it's true, I learned it from Mom.  Once the remodeling of the kitchen was accomplished, the dishwasher replaced me and the long talks over dishes ended.

I remember lessons at the ironing board.  We ironed our own shirts and Levis -- yeah, you heard me -- Levis!  We used to put them on "pant stretchers" after washing them, then ironed out the wrinkles and put a crease in them.  Are you kidding me?  I swear it's all true!  She stayed up with me teaching me how to darn socks before I left for England on my mission, certainly a lost art today.  When I got to the mission field I was well-trained in all the necessary survival skills.  Everything she taught me was put to use.  Laundry was always a big item at our house, and learning how to do it was a necessity.  Folding clothes and putting them away were also part of the weekly rituals.  Looking back now, I realize I was raised as the daughter she never had to begin her mothering years.

President Boyd K. Packer

 No account of my relationship with my Mother would be complete without recalling the "apricot story."  I even got in on all the fruit bottling my Mother did in the fall.  President Packer in Teach Ye Diligently reminded us of how memorable the lesson was as a result of the story President Lee told about one of his daughters (Helen) and one of her sons (yours truly).  He described the power of the story this way:

For example, take the expression "everyone loves a story," and you may see what I mean. If you have a point to put across and can illustrate it with a story, all can be taught. If you tell it in simple terms, a youngster can understand it; at the same time the oldest person may draw a great lesson from it. That is one of the reasons the Lord taught in parables. By so doing, He was teaching everybody at once, but not all of them the same lesson.

Some time ago in a meeting the Brethren were discussing motion pictures, specifically those that would strengthen the family. Someone mentioned one featuring President Harold B. Lee. "Which one?" someone asked. "There were many produced in which he appeared." One of the Brethren identified it simply by saying, "You know, the one about apricots."

Everyone nodded. That identified the film from all of the others. Why? Because in it President Lee had told an incident about his daughter canning apricots. Not wanting to be interrupted, she had almost put off her little boys who wanted help with their prayers. "But, Mommy, what is more important," one of them had asked, "prayers or apricots?"

In that film President Lee had lectured forcefully on strengthening the home, but the film is remembered as the "apricot" film. We may have missed other things, but we all got that message. Each of us was alike in remembering that.  (Boyd K. Packer, Teach Ye Diligently, 124-25).

Thankfully, the more feminine part of my nature was supplanted with the blessed arrival of a cherished daughter!  All that "girlie stuff" programming gradually gave way once Jane finally arrived.  "Elizabeth Jane," she named her -- after Queen Elizabeth of Great Britain.  It was during the 50s, and the royal family was greatly admired and held up as role models in America.  I was routinely reminded of my mother's affinity for the Queen and Prince Charles, since they had been pregnant with each of us at the same time.  My mother was heartbroken when news of his antics spread a few years ago.  She anguished for the Queen.  But the monarchy survived apparently, as new hope arises in the announcement of Prince William's engagement and his logical succession to the throne someday when Queen Elizabeth passes.  That has to tell you something about how long the Queen has been on the throne of England!

Mom was a role model among women.  They loved her for her example of righteous and concecrated motherhood and womanhood.  She was a leader among her peers, serving as the Relief Society president twice in the Federal Heights Ward, then on the General Board (twice) later in life.  After that assignment concluded she was surprised by a call to serve late in life as the stake Young Women's President.  When the call came to her, she asked, "Don't you mean Relief Society?" because that was all she had ever known.  She was assured they hadn't made a mistake and she served for three years, seeking to "spiritualize" the young women in her stake.

When she contracted ovarian cancer, she quickly arranged a dinner for her children and their companions at her home.  The diagnosis hadn't been announced, but she had a premonition something wasn't quite right.  When the diagnosis was confirmed, she was trying to pull her family back together again.  We had a three-and-one-half year protracted farewell with her.  Major surgeries and chemotherapy extended her life.  She did all she could to heal the inevitable rifts among us.  We learned to love and forgive one another because of her example.  One by one on her death bed we spent time as she quietly gave her final counsel to each.

I love my Mother.  I continue to feel her influence.  She had a way with me, and she took full advantage.  Whenever I was tempted to lie to her, she would take my face in her gentle hands and say firmly but gently, "Now David, look me in the eyes and tell me the truth."  She was the perfect combination of velvet and steel.  I couldn't ever get away with anything, it seemed.  She could pierce through my eyes into my very soul.  Nothing escaped her.  I realize now it was the power of a righteous life that aided her.  Discernment came easily to her.  She was on familiar terms with her Father in Heaven.  Her testimony of her Savior was unwavering.  Her influence, her words, her gentle touch and her inspiration continue to affect me.  I am confident there is nothing in my life of which she is unaware.  She continues to minister among us.


President Thomas S. Monson

So on the eve of this next Thanksgiving Day, falling as it does on her birthday once again, I pause to give thanks for my beloved Mother, Helen Lee Goates.  On the back of her funeral program we reprinted a letter she had written for the time capsule that was sealed in 1980.  President Thomas S. Monson quoted from that letter in a talk titled, "If Ye Are Prepared Ye Shall Not Fear," when he beautifully described her passing at a General Relief Society meeting in 2004, in these words:

As I conclude my remarks, may I share with you an experience of several years ago which depicted the strength of you dear sisters in Relief Society.

During 1980, the sesquicentennial year of the organization of the Church, each member of the Relief Society general board was asked to write a personal letter to the sisters of the Church in the year 2030 — 50 years hence. The following is an excerpt from the letter written by Sister Helen Lee Goates:

“Our world of 1980 is filled with uncertainty, but I am determined to live each day with faith and not fear, to trust the Lord and to follow the counsel of our prophet today. I know that God lives, and I love Him with all my soul. I am so grateful that the gospel was restored to the earth 150 years ago and that I can enjoy the blessings of membership in this great Church. I am grateful for the priesthood of God, having felt its power throughout my life.

“I am at peace in my world and pray that you may be sustained in yours by firm testimonies and unwavering convictions of the gospel of Jesus Christ.”

Helen Lee Goates passed away in April of the year 2000. Shortly before her impending death from cancer, Sister Monson and I visited with her and her husband and family. She appeared calm and at peace. She told us she was prepared to go and looked forward to seeing once again her parents and other loved ones who had preceded her. In her life Sister Goates exemplified the nobility of Latter-day Saint women. In her passing she personified your theme: “If ye are prepared ye shall not fear.”

She was well prepared for her death when she quietly slipped away.  I pray it might be said of me and all of us.