"Because of Jesus Christ. . ."

I reread the recent General Conference talk by Elder Dale G. Renlund yesterday, which is the title of my chapter this morning. https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2026/04/46renlund?lang=eng. As I read his summary of all that Jesus Christ has done for us, I couldn’t help but insert my own name in place of the Savior’s. I recommend a similar exercise for each of us.

The Savior has provided the Atonement. It is comprehensive and in my case at least almost incomprehensible as I grow older and face the certainty of my not-too-distant personal meeting with Him someday. I will pour out my heart to Him in what will no doubt be an inadequate expression of gratitude. I wonder this morning if I will ever truly understand what “worlds without number” and inhabitants of the same look like. Mind boggling is all I can come up with.

Elder Renlund at the beginning said: “I cannot add more time to your days or eliminate the many concerns modern life brings. But I can offer this counsel: Not all matters are of equal value, and maintaining an eternal perspective helps us prioritize the things that are of greatest value. On this Easter Sunday, let us consider why focusing on Jesus Christ and the ‘infinite virtue of His great atoning sacrifice’ is of greatest value and helps us no matter how many other concerns we must manage. His life, His mission, and the fruits of His Atonement bless us infinitely and daily.” (Emphasis mine).

And there’s that word “infinite” again. I am daily reminded of the many matters that consume my attention, even at this late stage in my life. Yes, life is substantially simpler than it was many years ago, but now I am in the throes of seeking answers about my comparatively paltry estate plan that will hopefully benefit us all.

I ask myself, “Because of David Goates, my posterity will be blessed in the following ways…” and now I am leaving it in their hands to fill in the blanks that remain.

Then I wonder if I were to write my own obituary, what would I include? Would I give a stark and naked assessment, recounting all my shortcomings, sins of commission or omission, dredging up hopefully a detailed list of failings and oversights, stupid decisions, and all the rest that went with it? Would I attempt to blame others for my misfortunes?

Or would I rely upon the mercy and merits of my Savior and Redeemer to have forgiven me for all of it? These poor pages I have assembled for all of you will no doubt provide ample fodder for your own answers to the question I am posing for each of us this morning. As my Savior has forgiven me, I pray each of you may find evidence sufficient to also forgive me.

I wrote a private letter to Patsy in recent weeks, which I will not share here, in which I poured out my heart and soul to her as though she were still at my side here in mortality. From her lofty perch in the spirit world I am hoping she may know perfectly the thoughts and the intents of my heart as I finalize my estate plan for the future of this little cabin where I live on the Provo River. It’s all I have left to give, and I hope it may be accomplished in some semblance of an orderly transition to our next generations that will outlive both of us who created it.

I loved the way Elder Renlund expressed it: “Because of the merits, mercy, and grace of Jesus Christ, we can return home to our Heavenly Father and live in His presence. This is only possible through Jesus Christ. The Savior Himself said, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.’ Jesus, who leads us to salvation, has the power to do for us what we cannot do for ourselves because He completed His Atonement.” (ibid., emphasis mine).

My Eternal Companion Patsy

I am acutely aware these days of all the many things I cannot do for myself, and therefore more accurately aware of my dependency upon the Atonement than ever before in my existence. I only desire the realization of one permanent goal in my life at this point - to return to the loving arms of my Savior and my Father in Heaven with honor and with my discipleship in clear evidence. By extension, I hope those loving arms include my celestial companion Patsy. So what is my motivation about anything that remains in my life? I just stated it.

Moments ago I watched a hawk swoop down from a tall pine tree outside my office window. It snagged an unsuspecting pot gut in its talons and then flew off to devour its prey. I have pondered and wondered over a lifetime if pot guts can possibly have any useful purpose on this earth, and as I shot a few over the weekend it remains an open question for me. I have murdered my fair share over the years living where I do. The perils and realities of mortality are that there always seems to be a bigger predator to take us out at any moment in time. Who or what will finally take me out? I leave the speculations to all who wish to play from the “list of horribles.”

Elder Renlund continues: “Jesus Christ has infinite capacity to forgive, promising that ‘as often as my people repent will I forgive them their trespasses against me.’ Because of Jesus Christ, sins for which we have sincerely repented leave no spiritual scar, track, or trace. There is no scarlet letter to wear, now or in the eternities. When we repent with real intent, the entirety of our sin, not just a part, is figuratively nailed to the cross and we no longer bear its spiritual consequences. After we have repented, we owe no more to justice because Jesus has paid the debt; He pardons us from deserved punishment. We are forgiven, our hearts and hands are made clean, and the Lord remembers our sins no more. The Lord our God ‘is mighty; he will save, [and] he will rejoice over [us].’” (ibid., emphasis mine).

I have concluded along with Elder Renlund that even though the Atonement is infinite, it is also deeply personal to me. When I truly see my feeble part that I play in mortality, and can look objectively and not defensively deep within my own heart and soul, I feel to rejoice in my Savior’s offering of repentance. All other considerations pale in insignificance. Introspection is a divine gift of the spirit.

“Focusing on the Savior, His infinite Atonement, and what He has done for us will bring joy and clarity into our lives, no matter how many other concerns we have. This is why ancient and modern prophets have and always will direct us to Christ. You may remember that President Russell M. Nelson taught, ‘Whatever questions or problems you have, the answer is always found in the life and teachings of Jesus Christ.’ And President Dallin H. Oaks, the Lord’s living prophet today, simply declared, ‘Jesus Christ is the way.’” (ibid.)

So here is my humble answer to my own question, “Because of David Goates, I was taught about the Atonement of Jesus Christ.”

Now, please consider the answer to that question as you insert your own name into that sentence. What will your legacy be? I hope the answers will be as enlightening to you as they have been for me this morning.

"Alive in Christ"

I am prompted this morning to say a few words about loving one another more fully. I posted online yesterday after a visit to the Mount Timpanogus Temple with Jeff for an endowment session, and I included our picture together.

Mount Timpanogus Temple

Back came this response from an anonymous source: “I genuinely miss when we drove Mormon scum out of the states.” I am not just imagining the recent escalation of anti-Mormon hatred online over this perpetual debate about whether Mormons are Christians. When I see it in my relatively obscure timeline on “X”, then it becomes real and intensely personal.

However, when I see these attacks in my timeline I am reminded that anonymous sources are simply sniping from behind whatever electronic cover is convenient. And then I even go so far as to wonder if some of these responses are nothing more than automatically generated from some AI source beyond my capacity to comprehend. Hence, I ignore them rather than attempt further engagement.

President Dallin H. Oaks in his most recent General Conference address at the conclusion of the two days, including the Solemn Assembly, observed:

“Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

“But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you” (Matthew 5:43–44).

What a revolutionary teaching for personal relationships! Love even your enemies! But who are our enemies? The full meaning of enemies in the sources from which King James’s translators chose the word enemies includes military foes but even extends to any who actively oppose one another. Today we might say that we are commanded to love our adversaries. All mortals are beloved children of God. As President David O. McKay taught, “There is no better way to manifest love for God than to show an unselfish love for one’s fellowmen.” (https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2026/04/49oaks?lang=eng).

Such vitriol coming from someone (or something) anonymous is one thing, but when it comes from one with whom we might be living under the same roof it is nearly unbearable. But for the saving grace offered by our Savior and Redeemer, we would be consumed and sorely tempted to fight back with all we have in retaliation. However, that is not the way of peacemakers, as suggested in President Oaks’ comments. His talk was entitled “Alive in Christ.”

… President Howard W. Hunter described this same love of God toward His children: “The world in which we live would benefit greatly if men and women everywhere would exercise the pure love of Christ, which is kind, meek, and lowly. … It has no place for bigotry, hatred, or violence. … It encourages diverse people to live together in Christian love regardless of religious belief, race, nationality, financial standing, education, or culture.” (ibid.)

It is so much easier to accept and try to live these principles on the wide stage of life in this electronic age that encompasses the broad expanse of the world at large. It’s easy for me to ignore the personal attacks like the one I cited above, but it is something quite different when we are faced with such hostility in our own homes and families.

I stood in fast and testimony meeting earlier this week to bear my witness of the divinity of my personal Savior Jesus Christ. I pointed out the simple symbols of the sacrament - the bread and the water - His flesh that was broken and tortured, producing a flow of blood from every pore in His body. His agony for the sins of those who had lived not only on this earth, but “on worlds without number” is truly mind-boggling to me. He voluntarily came to earth and surrendered, even as the Father withdrew at the height of His Son’s suffering. It was part of the Father’s plan for exaltation, including the sacrifice and the provision for a Savior in the premortal realms of the spirit world. We are instructed about those details with each endowment session we attend, as Jeff and I did yesterday.

Each of us can strive to follow our Savior in His teachings about how to relate to one another. This does not mean surrendering our values. The covenants we have made inevitably position us as devoted participants in the eternal contest between truth and error. We balance our various responsibilities.

This balancing is not easy. When we seek to keep all the commandments in our personal lives, we are sometimes accused of having no love for those who don’t. When we show personal love and support loving causes, we are sometimes misunderstood as implying support for results that contradict our other religious duties. But as followers of Christ, we should seek to live peaceably and lovingly with other children of God who do not share our values and do not have the covenant obligations we have assumed. In a democratic government we should seek fairness for all. In countless circumstances, strangers’ suspicions or even hostility gradually gives way to friendship when personal contacts produce mutual respect.

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught that we should “pour forth love” to all people. Speaking of our Savior, the Apostle John wrote, “We love him, because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19). We can follow the example of Jesus Christ, who is our role model, by choosing to love others — even if they show little or no love toward us. He declared, “Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God” (Matthew 5:9; see also 3 Nephi 12:9). (ibid., emphasis mine).

“Peacemakers” is (or should be) endemic in our discipleship, if we are truly followers of Jesus Christ who can be accurately characterized as Christians. Our critics outside the Church seem to be unrelenting. I suspect they will persist in their attacks until the Savior comes again to put an end to it all.

I read again about the Israelite child king Josiah yesterday after the temple session when I returned home. He was ordained at the age of eight, a descendant of King David. King Josiah reigned as the 16th king of Judah from approximately 640 to 609 BCE, ascending the throne at the age of eight after the assassination of his father, King Amon (2 Kings 22:1; 2 Chronicles 34:1). Despite his youth, he became one of Judah’s most righteous kings, contrasting sharply with his predecessors, including his grandfather Manasseh and father Amon, who had promoted idolatry. He tore down the “groves” where idolatry was prevalent among the Israelites, and restored the sanctity of temple worship. He opposed wickedness, and established peace in the people who were constantly swinging back and forth in their discipleship from the time they had been delivered from Egypt.

Putting this all in context, let me simply say that we are living in the end of times, truly, when our faith in Jesus Christ as our Deliverer is being tested to the uttermost degree imaginable. Be comforted, therefore, that what we are experiencing right now is not without precedent from Old Testament times until now. Remaining steadfast in our discipleship is not only desirable, it is also possible.

We have not been abandoned simply because moral agency is playing out right before our eyes. Some will choose poorly, determined to “win” in this world at the expense of others, simply because their definition of “winning” is tainted and corrupted.

Winning was defined instead as submitting in exchange for the fulfillment of a higher purpose - exaltation in the eternal realms up ahead.

We will attain those higher goals one day, as improbable as it may seem today. Of that reality I am growing daily in confidence.

What is Something Prophets Have Shared That Brought You Closer to the Savior?

Amelia, a granddaughter, asked this question the other day as I was headed out to the Orem Temple for an endowment session. I was officiating for a great uncle four times removed who was born in 1704 in Lincolnshire, England. It was yet another glorious, full session.

As I was leaving I held the entrance door open for a man dressed in his whites. He was seated in his automated wheelchair, his temple clothes in a suitcase on his lap, and then I noticed he had no feet. There was no one assisting him, but I was immediately humbled by just the sight of him coming to the temple, independent and faithful.

President Harold B. Lee

To answer Milsie’s question as I pondered it, I decided to isolate my response to the teachings of my Prophet Grandfather, Harold B. Lee. He was the 11th President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and he had a singular imprint on my soul. I longed to be as knowledgeable in the scriptures as he was. He anchored his soul in the scriptures all his life, as noted below. It was through him that I gleaned the desire to become as he was, and I slowly came to know that it required consistent and systematic effort over the course of a lifetime to become as he was. I feel his eyes upon me even after all these years, and I pray I may continue to endure in faith in my Lord Jesus Christ to the end.

His grave marker in the Salt Lake City Cemetery

Of course, there are many, many prophets to whom I could turn for the answers, but I want to capture the essence of this preeminent progenitor, for all of us this morning so you may become more familiar with who he was and what he taught.

“I once had a visit from a young Catholic priest who came with a stake missionary from Colorado. I asked him why he had come, and he replied, ‘I came to see you.’

“‘Why?’ I asked.

“‘Well,’ he said, ‘I have been searching for certain concepts that I have not been able to find. But I think I am finding them now in the Mormon community.’

“That led to a half-hour conversation. I told him, ‘Father, when your heart begins to tell you things that your mind does not know, then you are getting the Spirit of the Lord.’

“He smiled and said, ‘I think that’s happening to me already.’

“‘Then don’t wait too long,’ I said to him.

“A few weeks later I received a telephone call from him. He said, ‘Next Saturday I am going to be baptized a member of the Church, because my heart has told me things my mind did not know.’

“He was converted. He saw what he should have seen. He heard what he should have heard. He understood what he should have understood, and he was doing something about it. He had a testimony.” (Stand Ye in Holy Places [1974], 92–93, emphasis added.)

“I bear you my testimony that I know the Savior lives, that the most powerful witness you can have that He lives comes when the power of the Holy Spirit bears witness to your soul that He does live. More powerful than sight, more powerful than walking and talking with Him, is that witness of the Spirit by which you shall be judged if you were to turn against Him. But it is the responsibility of all of you, as well as my responsibility, to get that testimony established. We are constantly asked, just how does one receive revelation? The Lord said in a revelation to the early leaders, ‘I will tell you in your mind and in your heart by the Holy Ghost. It shall dwell within you. This is the revelation by which Moses led the children of Israel to the Red Sea and on across it.’ (See D&C 8:2–3.) When that Spirit has witnessed to our spirit, that’s a revelation from Almighty God.” (Address given at Lausanne, Switzerland conference, 26 Sept. 1972, Historical Department Archives, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 8.)

“Not many have seen the Savior face to face here in mortality, but there is no one of us who has been blessed to receive the gift of the Holy Ghost after baptism but that may have a perfect assurance of His existence as though we had seen. Indeed, if we have faith in the reality of His existence even though we have not seen, as the Master implied in His statement to Thomas, even greater is the blessing to those who ‘have not seen, and yet have believed’ (John 20:29), for ‘we walk by faith, not by sight’ (2 Corinthians 5:7). Although not seeing, yet believing, we rejoice with joy unspeakable in receiving the end of our faith, even the salvation of our souls (see 1 Peter 1:8–9).” (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 93.)

“Can we sum it up and say then, that any person who has received a true testimony has received a revelation from the living God, or else he would not have the testimony? Anyone who has a testimony, then, has enjoyed the gift of prophecy, he’s had the spirit of revelation. He has had the gift by which the prophets have been able to speak things pertaining to their responsibilities…

“The Lord help us all to strive to gain that testimony most vital in our preparation to know. When finally we get that one divine thought that Joseph Smith was and is a prophet and that the gospel is true, all the other seeming difficulties melt away like heavy frost before the coming of the rising sun.” (“Church and Divine Revelation,” 1954, Historical Department Archives, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 17, 23, emphasis added.)

“Now when our missionaries go out, we say to those among whom they labor, ‘We are not asking you to join the Church just to put your name on the records. That is not our concern. We come to you offering you the greatest gift the world can give, the gift of the kingdom of God. This is here for you if you will only accept and believe.’ Now that is our challenge to the world. ‘We can teach you the doctrines of the Church of Jesus Christ and bear testimony of the divinity of the work, but the witness of the truth of what we teach has to come from your own searching.’

“We say to our people whom we teach, ‘Now, you ask the Lord. Study, work, and pray.’ This is the process by which people are brought into the Church, and it is the same way that from the beginning the honest in heart everywhere have been brought into the Church.” (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 135–36.)

“As Jesus lifted up his eyes in prayer as ‘his hour was come,’ (see John 17:1) he gave expression to a profound truth that should be full of meaning to every soul: ‘And this is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.’ (John 17:3.) While this expression has deeper significance than I shall discuss here, I should like to take one thought from it. How can you know the Father and the Son? … We begin to acquire that knowledge by study. The Savior counseled us to ‘Search the scriptures; for in them ye think ye have eternal life: and they are they which testify of me.’ (John 5:39, see also Moses 6:63 and 2 Nephi 11:24.) Therein will be found a history of God’s dealings with mankind in every dispensation and the works and words of the prophets and those of the Savior himself as given ‘by inspiration of God,’ as the Apostle Paul said, ‘and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.’ (2 Timothy 3:16–17.) Youth should let no day pass without reading from these sacred books.

“But it is not enough merely to learn of his life and works by study. It was the Master who replied in answer to the question as to how one might know of him and his doctrine: ‘If any man will do his will, he shall know.’ (John 7:17.) Would you think an authority on science to be one who had never experimented in a laboratory? Would you give much heed to the comments of a music critic who did not know music or an art critic who didn’t paint? Just so, one like yourself who would ‘know God’ must be one who does his will and keeps his commandments and practices the virtues Jesus lived.” (Decisions for Successful Living [1973], 39–40; paragraphing added, emphasis added.)

“The acquiring of knowledge by faith is no easy road to learning. It demands strenuous effort and a continual striving by faith…

“In short, learning by faith is no task for a lazy man. Someone has said, in effect, that such a process requires the bending of the whole soul, the calling up from the depths of the human mind and linking it with God — the right connection must be formed. Then only comes ‘knowledge by faith.’” (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 331.)

Here’s one of my favorites that hangs in a frame on my office wall as a reminder of the precious fruit that is a testimony:

“Testimony is as elusive as a moonbeam; it’s as fragile as an orchid; you have to recapture it every morning of your life. You have to hold on by study, and by faith, and by prayer. If you allow yourself to be angry, if you allow yourself to get into the wrong kind of company, you listen to the wrong kind of stories, you are studying the wrong kind of subjects, you are engaging in sinful practices, there is nothing that will be more deadening as to take away the Spirit of the Lord from you until it will be as though you had walked from a lighted room when you go out of this building, as though you had gone out into a darkness.” (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 331.)

“That which you possess today in testimony will not be yours tomorrow unless you do something about it. Your testimony is either going to increase or it is going to diminish, depending on you. Will you remember your responsibility, then? The Lord said, ‘If any man will do his will, he shall know of the doctrine, whether it be of God, or whether I speak of myself’” (John 7:17). (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 331, emphasis added.)

“The Master was saying, and I am saying to you today, that the rains of disaster, the rains of difficulty, the floods and winds of severe trials are going to beat upon the house of every one of you. There will be temptation to sin, you will have hardship, you will have difficulty to face in your life. The only ones that will not fall when those tests come will be those who have their houses founded upon the rock of testimony. You will know no matter what comes; you will not be able to stand on borrowed light. You can only stand on the light that you have by the witness of the Spirit that all of you have the right to receive.” (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 140.)

As a newly called Apostle in April, 1941, he once described his testimony this way many years later looking back:

“I come to you today as a special witness charged with, above all else, the responsibility of bearing that witness. There have been intimate circumstances when I have known with a surety. When I was searching for the Spirit to deliver a talk on the Easter theme [in 1941], the resurrection of the Lord, I closeted myself, read the four gospels, particularly down to the Crucifixion, the Resurrection, and I had something happen to me. As I read, it was as though I was reliving, almost, the very incident, not just a story. And then I delivered my message and bore testimony that now, as one of the least of my brethren, I, too, had a personal witness of the death and the resurrection of our Lord and Master. Why? Because I had had something burned into my soul that I could speak with a certainty that is beside all doubt. So can you. And the most satisfying thing in all the world, the greatest anchor to your soul, in time of trouble, in time of temptation, in times of sickness, in times of indecision, in times of your struggles and work, [is that] you can know with a certainty that defies all doubt that God lives.” (Education for Eternity, “The Last Message” lecture given at the Salt Lake Institute of Religion, 15 Jan. 1971, 11, emphasis added.)

“You, too, can know that your Redeemer lives, as did Job in the midst of his temptation to ‘curse God, and die,’ (see Job 2:9; 19:25) and know also that you, too, can open the door and invite Him in ‘to sup with you.’ (See Revelation 3:20.) See also yourselves one day as resurrected beings claiming kinship to Him who gave His life that the rewards to mortal men for earthly struggle and experience will be the fruits of eternal life even though as measured by human standards one’s life’s labors seemed to have been defeated.” (In Conference Report, April 1958, 136.)

This next teaching reverberates within me too. There is a fellowship in suffering that only those who have experienced it acutely can know fully. He knew because of the suffering he experienced in the decade of the 60s with the deaths of his beloved companion Fern, and his daughter Maurine, just how painful death of a loved one could be. And now, so do I. I have also buried my wife and a daughter.

“I know … what it means to have the shattering devastation of loneliness with the snatching away of a loved one. Over my years, I have been called and tried to comfort those who mourn, but until I had to repeat those very things to myself that I have been saying to others, then only did I come to sense something that was far beyond words, that had to reach down to the touchstone of the soul before one can give real comfort. You have to see part of you buried in the grave. You have to see the loved one die and then you have to ask yourself — Do you believe what you have been teaching others? Are you sure and certain that God lives? Do you believe in the Atonement of the Lord and Master — that He opened the doors to the resurrection in the more glorious life? Sometimes when we stand in the stark nakedness all alone, it’s then that our testimony has to grow deep if we are not going to be shattered and fall by the wayside.

“As the wife … of Job said, ‘Why don’t you curse God and die.’ (See Job 2:9.) But in the majesty of Job’s suffering, he gave expression to something that I think no funeral service is quite complete without repeating. He said, ‘I know that my redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth; and though after my skin worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God; whom I shall see for myself, … and not another; though my reins be consumed within me.’ (Job 19:25–27.) You folks today, if you know that you have anchored your souls in that divine testimony that He lives and that at the latter day He will stand upon this earth and you will meet Him face to face — if you know that, no matter what the risks and the responsibilities and the tragedies may be — if you build your house upon the rock, you won’t falter. Yes, you’ll go through the terrifying experience of sorrow over a lost loved one, but you won’t falter; eventually you’ll come through with even greater faith than you ever had before.” (Address given at the funeral of David H. Cannon, 29 Jan. 1968, Historical Department Archives, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 5–6, emphasis added.)

“The path to [exaltation] is rugged and steep. Many stumble and fall, and through discouragement never pick themselves up to start again. The forces of evil cloud the path with many foggy deterrents, often trying to detour us in misleading trails. But through all this journey,” assured President Lee, “there is the calming assurance that if we choose the right, success will be ours, and the achievement of it will have molded and formed and created us into the kind of person qualified to be accepted into the presence of God. What greater success could there be than to have all that God has?” (The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, 69–70.)

“Isaiah said: ‘But now, O Lord, thou art our father; we are the clay, and thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand.’ (Isaiah 64:8.)

“I’ve read that verse many times but had not received the full significance until I was down in Mexico a few years ago at Tlalcapaca, where the people mold clay into various kinds of pottery. There I saw them take clay that had been mixed by crude, primitive methods, the molder wading in the mud to mix it properly. Then it was put upon a potter’s wheel and the potter began to fashion the intricate bits of pottery, which he was to place on the market. And as we watched, we saw occasionally, because of some defect in the mixing, the necessity for pulling the whole lump of clay apart and throwing it back in to be mixed over again, and sometimes the process had to be repeated several times before the mud was properly mixed.

“With that in mind, I began to see the meaning of this scripture: Yes, we too have to be tried and tested by poverty, by sickness, by the death of loved ones, by temptation, sometimes by the betrayal of supposed friends, by affluence and riches, by ease and luxury, by false educational ideas, and by the flattery of the world. A father, explaining this matter to his son, said,

“‘And to bring about his eternal purposes in the end of man, after he had created our first parents, and the beasts of the field and the fowls of the air, and in fine, all things which are created, it must needs be that there was an opposition; even the forbidden fruit in opposition to the tree of life; the one being sweet and the other bitter.’ (2 Nephi 2:15.)

“It was the Prophet Joseph Smith who said, speaking of this refining process, that he was like a huge, rough stone rolling down the mountainside, and the only polishing he got was when some rough corner came in contact with something else, knocking off a corner here and a corner there. But, he said, ‘Thus I will become a… polished shaft in the quiver of the Almighty.’ [History of the Church, 5:401.]

“So, we must be refined; we must be tested in order to prove the strength and power that are in us.” (Stand Ye in Holy Places [1974], 114–15.)

This was his message in his inaugural press conference after he had been set apart and ordained as the new President of the Church in 1972:

“‘Keep the commandments of God,’ for therein is the one course that brings that inward peace of which the Master spoke when He bade farewell to His disciples: ‘These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.’ (John 16:33) So may each of you, in the midst of the turmoil all about you, find that heavenly assurance from the Master who loves us all, which puts to flight all fears when, like the Master, you also have overcome the things of the world.” (“A Message to Members in the Service,” Church News, 2 Dec. 1972, 3.)

When Harold B. Lee was President of the Church, he and his wife were visiting missionaries across the country.

Harold: How are you doing, elders?

Elders: Wonderful. Thank you for visiting us.

Harold: It’s my pleasure. You’re doing great work out here.

Before their trip was finished, President Lee felt impressed to return home.

Harold: I’m not feeling very well. I think we should go home as quickly as possible.

Joan: I think so, too. We’ll just have to miss the rest of our appointments.

President Lee and his wife were soon on an airplane headed for Utah. During the flight, he thought he felt someone touch him.

Harold: Did someone just touch my head?

Joan: I didn’t touch you.

President Lee looked up, but no one was there. Later, President Lee felt hands on his head again. He knew that he was being blessed by angels, but he didn’t know why.

When they arrived home, President Lee was feeling worse.

Joan: I’ll call the doctor.

President Lee went to the hospital. Doctors found that an ulcer inside his body was bleeding badly. If he had started bleeding on the airplane, he could have died.

During General Conference, President Lee told the members about his experience.

Harold: I know that there are divine powers that reach out when all other help is not available. Yes, I know that there are such powers. (See Ensign, July 1973, page 123, emphasis added.)

* * *

I will conclude this entry by stating to Amelia and to all my posterity that I do know I have grown closer to my Savior Jesus Christ by studying ALL the sermons of President Harold B. Lee throughout my life. I have given you only a small sample here. He has inspired me, continually and eternally, because of my relationship to him as his eldest grandson. He called me “Skipper,” which was his nickname suggesting I needed to set the example for my younger siblings and cousins (there were 10 of us). He explained I was to be the one who would “set the sail” for our mortal journey together. I was initially intimidated about that role, trust me, but I learned to grow into it because he had designated it for me.

I have outlived him in the number of years we were in mortality, and now I often reflect about what seemed his premature death when he was taken home on December 26, 1973, the day after Christmas. Maybe it’s only because I am a slow learner - certainly slower than he! Whatever the case, I inexorably draw closer to the day when I will depart this earthly existence.

Before that day occurs, I want to enjoy my remaining days sharing with each of you in this format. It has been a labor of love to assure you how much YOU are loved. If it is determined to be only a fraction of how much Harold B. Lee loved me, then I will be content.

Harold B. Lee and his "Skipper"

Today Begins Holy Week

Temple with Angels

I spent some time this week in the temple, as is my customary pattern these days. I read in 3 Nephi 11:1-17, while I was waiting for the session to begin:

And now it came to pass that there were a great multitude gathered together, of the people of Nephi, round about the temple which was in the land Bountiful; and they were marveling and wondering one with another, and were showing one to another the great and marvelous change which had taken place.

And they were also conversing about this Jesus Christ, of whom the sign had been given concerning his death.

And it came to pass that while they were thus conversing one with another, they heard a voice as if it came out of heaven; and they cast their eyes round about, for they understood not the voice which they heard; and it was not a harsh voice, neither was it a loud voice; nevertheless, and notwithstanding it being a small voice it did pierce them that did hear to the center, insomuch that there was no part of their frame that it did not cause to quake; yea, it did pierce them to the very soul, and did cause their hearts to burn.

And it came to pass that again they heard the voice, and they understood it not.

And again the third time they did hear the voice, and did open their ears to hear it; and their eyes were towards the sound thereof; and they did look steadfastly towards heaven, from whence the sound came.

And behold, the third time they did understand the voice which they heard; and it said unto them:

Behold my Beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased, in whom I have glorified my name — hear ye him.

And it came to pass, as they understood they cast their eyes up again towards heaven; and behold, they saw a Man descending out of heaven; and he was clothed in a white robe; and he came down and stood in the midst of them; and the eyes of the whole multitude were turned upon him, and they durst not open their mouths, even one to another, and wist not what it meant, for they thought it was an angel that had appeared unto them.

And it came to pass that he stretched forth his hand and spake unto the people, saying:

Behold, I am Jesus Christ, whom the prophets testified shall come into the world.

And behold, I am the light and the life of the world; and I have drunk out of that bitter cup which the Father hath given me, and have glorified the Father in taking upon me the sins of the world, in the which I have suffered the will of the Father in all things from the beginning.

And it came to pass that when Jesus had spoken these words the whole multitude fell to the earth; for they remembered that it had been prophesied among them that Christ should show himself unto them after his ascension into heaven.

And it came to pass that the Lord spake unto them saying:

Arise and come forth unto me, that ye may thrust your hands into my side, and also that ye may feel the prints of the nails in my hands and in my feet, that ye may know that I am the God of Israel, and the God of the whole earth, and have been slain for the sins of the world.

And it came to pass that the multitude went forth, and thrust their hands into his side, and did feel the prints of the nails in his hands and in his feet; and this they did do, going forth one by one until they had all gone forth, and did see with their eyes and did feel with their hands, and did know of a surety and did bear record, that it was he, of whom it was written by the prophets, that should come.

And when they had all gone forth and had witnessed for themselves, they did cry out with one accord, saying:

Hosanna! Blessed be the name of the Most High God! And they did fall down at the feet of Jesus, and did worship him. (Emphasis mine.)

The words “GREAT multitude” jumped off the page at me. A multitude of eye witnesses of the resurrected Savior Jesus Christ!! The Book of Mormon is the unimpeachable and true record of the reality of Christ’s resurrection. It’s why we refer to it as “Another Testament of Jesus Christ.”

Today is known as “Palm Sunday,” commemorating Christ’s triumphant entry into the city of Jerusalem when palm fronds were strewn before Him as He rode on the back of a donkey into the city.

Christ's Triumphal Entry into Jerusalem

His true believers were hailing Him as the Son of God, but it would also mark the beginning of the end of His mortal life.

My brief study in the temple this week also prompted me to turn to 2 Nephi 10, where the reasons for His coming to Jerusalem are spelled out:

Jacob explains that the Jews will crucify their God — They will be scattered until they begin to believe in Him - America will be a land of liberty where no king will rule - Reconcile yourselves to God and gain salvation through His grace. About 559–545 B.C.

And now I, Jacob, speak unto you again, my beloved brethren, concerning this righteous branch of which I have spoken.

For behold, the promises which we have obtained are promises unto us according to the flesh; wherefore, as it has been shown unto me that many of our children shall perish in the flesh because of unbelief, nevertheless, God will be merciful unto many; and our children shall be restored, that they may come to that which will give them the true knowledge of their Redeemer.

Wherefore, as I said unto you, it must needs be expedient that Christ. . . should come among the Jews, among those who are the more wicked part of the world; and they shall crucify him - for thus it behooveth our God, and there is none other nation on earth that would crucify their God.

For should the mighty miracles be wrought among other nations they would repent, and know that he be their God.

But because of priestcrafts and iniquities, they at Jerusalem will stiffen their necks against him, that he be crucified.

Wherefore, because of their iniquities, destructions, famines, pestilences, and bloodshed shall come upon them; and they who shall not be destroyed shall be scattered among all nations.

But behold, thus saith the Lord God: When the day cometh that they shall believe in me, that I am Christ, then have I covenanted with their fathers that they shall be restored in the flesh, upon the earth, unto the lands of their inheritance.

And it shall come to pass that they shall be gathered in from their long dispersion, from the isles of the sea, and from the four parts of the earth; and the nations of the Gentiles shall be great in the eyes of me, saith God, in carrying them forth to the lands of their inheritance. (2 Nephi 10:1-8, emphasis mine).

He came to Jerusalem among the Jews because “there is none other nation on earth that would crucify their God.” Their degree of wickedness had reached its zenith and found expression, sadly, in the crucifixion of our Lord. The events leading up to His betrayal by Judas Iscariot and subsequent crucifixion are well-documented in the New Testament. It’s only in the Book of Mormon, however, that we learn the answer to the “why” question.

I will encourage each of you to spend some time in your family circles this week, the Holy Week, reviewing the events that culminated in the happy conclusion of resurrection morning. I have loved seeing this portrait prominently featured in the temple film:

Mary Greets Christ in the Garden

She was the first of many witnesses, including the multitude in the New World, to see the Savior in His resurrected body. All of us who embrace the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon are likewise witnesses of that reality. The promises we will someday stand in His glorified presence and share eternal with the Father and the Son are astounding and comforting beyond my ability to describe them.

As one continues reading in 2 Nephi 9-10, the glorious and eternal promises that are held out for the Jews who crucified Him are perhaps the ultimate expression of forgiveness that we have in Holy Writ. As I grow older in my mortal probation there is little left on earth that stimulates me more than the HOPE of eternal life with Patsy and all my progenitors who have preceded me. It is a door through which I will someday pass, and I am filled with eager anticipation of its fulfillment even as I continue to revel in my joy among my family here in the flesh. Truly, I can say I am living in the best of times in my life.

Never doubt that you are loved and cherished by your Father in Heaven and His Son Jesus Christ. They have made ample provision for each of us despite our weaknesses and imperfections in the generous plan of salvation that includes the possibility of repentance and forgiveness.

My memories of what Patsy did to emphasize her testimony of the Savior’s resurrection on Easter morning are always fresh in my mind. The glorious Easter feast she always provided with her lace tablecloths, crystal goblets, best chinaware and sterling silverware, were emblematic of her belief that her best was never good enough in exchange for what her Savior had done for her and for each of us. It was her way to say “Thank You,” and so it must be for each of us. 

When we do our best to emulate the goodness of God as we act in service and love for our fellowmen, we are demonstrating our love for Him and our Father in Heaven in the best way we know how.

I love you too. I love the newness of Spring. I have seen the sandhill cranes, the mallard ducks, the rock chucks and pot guts, even the deer, and the snow is nearly all gone this week. The river is rising, the sky today is a radiant azure blue overhead, and the temperatures are almost balmy.

What a glorious time in which we live! And it’s Holy Week too!

Stop Trying? Really?

 “You’re Number One today, so you can stop trying.” That was the greeting I received yesterday in the brothers dressing room at the Mount Timpanogos Temple from one of the ordinance workers who was assigning the lockers. (I got assigned to locker F-1). I went there for an endowment session with my daughter Emily, then later we went to her home so she could trim my silver locks.

That greeting has stayed trapped at the frontal lobe of my brain for the last twenty-four hours. I haven’t been able to shake its implications since I heard it.

Of course, he was simply using an analogy (if that’s what it was), but I can’t help wondering if we ever reach a point in our eternal progression where we “can stop trying.”

Since it’s timely, and the World Series starts tonight (it’s October 25, 2024), think about what’s going through the brains of the players on the field for the Dodgers and the Yankees. Each won their respective NLCS and ALCS championships as the Number One teams in their respective National and American Leagues, but don’t think for one minute that anyone on that field tonight is thinking their work is done. Each is still trying to win the World Series, because finishing second just isn’t an option.

And that’s true across the board in every sport. Being Number One is always the goal, and nothing less will satisfy. 

I can’t help reflecting on why we learn so little about the Telestial and the Terrestrial Kingdoms in the scriptures. Instead, our Father in Heaven reveals A LOT about Celestial Glory, particularly the highest degree of the Celestial Kingdom. Why? Because He’s interested in showering upon us ALL that He has upon conditions of repentance. Nothing less will satisfy His hopes for each of us.

It’s why President Russell M. Nelson seems so fixated upon the temples these days. He is preparing a kingdom of mortal people for the Celestial glory that awaits the faithful in these latter days. He teaches about the atonement of Jesus Christ as the key to obtaining those glorious blessings. The Savior died for us in a voluntary sacrifice for our sins, and when we repent of our sins He saves us and qualifies us for eternal life. President Nelson is ignoring EVERYTHING else. If he were a gambling man, we would say he is “ALL IN” on his bet on the Savior. 

He invites us to keep trying to obtain eternal life. I can’t imagine him ever saying to any of us, “You’re Number One now, so quit trying.” I envision him as Number One among us mortals, certainly, but do I think President Nelson is done trying? He’s 100 years old now, and he continues trying to expand our faith, our vision for the future and our eternal prospects. And I suspect he will continue doing so until he draws his last breath on this planet.

Yesterday I was drawn to the story of Amulek. I reflected on this prophet’s life as I read in the Book of Mormon in the chapel while I was waiting for the session to begin. He became Alma’s missionary companion (start reading about him in Alma 8). An angel stopped Amulek along the road one day, and instructed him to return to his home where he would meet a prophet of God who was hungry and needed Amulek’s sustenance. He was told Alma would bless him and his whole posterity if he would be obedient.

Amulek proved to be a blessing for Alma, and together they had much success among an extremely wicked population of the city of Ammonihah in those days, not unlike what we are witnessing in the world today. They kept trying, nevertheless, even though the record gives little doubt Alma was rejected - the scripture states they “reviled him, and spit upon him, and caused that he should be cast out of their city” - so he was abused and imprisoned for his efforts. Alma had given up the position of chief judge among the people so he could become a full-time missionary. Because he no longer held the “title” he was rejected by his tormentors, but still he kept trying to bring as many souls to Christ as he could.

And that’s just one example from scripture - there are scores more. 

I will be forever grateful to living prophets among whom I have lived. I have a testimony of the priesthood authority and the power that goes with it if we are true and faithful. 

Just this week I witnessed it in my brother, who was initially diagnosed with acute occlusions in two of his heart arteries and was scheduled for an installation of stents. He asked for a priesthood blessing from his two brothers and his son-in-law. He asked me to be voice, but I was merely a conduit to the heavenly throne of our Father in Heaven. 

An angiogram is a scan that uses X-rays, CT scans, or MRIs to examine blood vessels and blood flow in the body. A contrast dye is injected into a blood vessel to make the blood vessels visible on the scan. When my brother's angiogram was performed, the doctors were surprised by the finding. The occlusions, instead of being in the 90% category as originally diagnosed, were found to be in the 20-30% range and did not qualify for insertion of stents. The minimum threshold protocol calls for 50% occlusion. What’s the explanation for such a wide dichotomy on the findings?

My brother was blessed by priesthood power. He will be the first to tell you he received a miracle from his Heavenly Father. If he continues to be mindful of his ongoing genetic tendency toward heart disease and takes precautions, his life will be extended. His faith in God will also be a companion to his medical care taking.

These principles I have written about this morning are real, and they are as efficacious in our year of 2024 as they were in the year 62 B.C. when Amulek and Alma were trying to bless their people with the gifts of the gospel.

I love each of you, and I encourage you to never stop trying in all your righteous endeavors. Heavenly Father is the epitome of good in our lives, and is the True Number One in our universe. 

He will never stop trying to bless us with everything that is good for our blessing and the blessing of those we serve. It’s what He does, and He has always done it. So must we as His emissaries across the globe wherever we are called to go and minister.

Like Amulek, if we remain true and faithful our entire posterity will be blessed.

And Then She Was Gone. . .

I write today to inform the world of the passing of my spouse and eternal companion, Patsy. Her passing came upon us all suddenly and without much warning. Those who have heard about it have asked, "Was she sick?" The answer is simple: not until in the last twenty-four hours when sepsis filled her body.

I met Patsy Hewlett when she was a student at East High School, one year younger than me. Until she drew her final peaceful breath on Earth, she loved me and her whole family completely, absolutely and wholeheartedly without any reservations. She was an emissary of Jesus Christ, a true angel on Earth. Easily the most spiritual woman I have ever known, she was on intimate terms with the Almighty.

One night recently, we settled down in front of the TV to watch a movie together over dinner. I asked her to say the blessing on the food while I paused the movie. There is a counter that tracks the minutes between the pause button and the play button. When we looked up again, the timer had exceeded 15 minutes. And that was a prayer over food, but so much more! Her individual prayer roll grew longer with each passing month. I used to tease her that she left out the tribe of Reuben. Oh, what prayers we have shared together over the years! Her final act on Earth, I believe, was to die, return to the spirit world and begin answering her own prayers on behalf of all for whom she prayed. Don't be surprised if you discover a new guardian angel who is pleading your cause before the Throne of Divine Grace. Without even knowing it, you may have been on her mind and in her heart. 💗💗 She loved, loved, loved hearts.

How I love this dear companion! Our first date by all accounts should have been recorded as a complete disaster. They ran out of food before we got there, the dance band had taken a break just before we arrived, and there was nothing to do but take up a spot on the side of the dance floor and talk. And oh, did we talk!

Our conversation expanded into the early morning hours on our way back home. It was soul-searching, deeply spiritual, and wide-ranging. I was amazed at the depth of her soul, the strength of her testimony, and the power that spilled forth from her all night long. When quizzed by my mother the next morning, she asked, "What was Patsy wearing?" I stammered out a response, "I think it was a yellow gown." I quickly assured her my memory wasn't bad, but that we were engrossed in a spirit to spirit deep connection I had never encountered. 

One of our younger sons said to me yesterday that he has been lamenting his children would not know or be able to remember Grandma Patsy. I said to him, "Don't worry, I will write the exhaustive seven-volume series about her and I won't leave a single stone unturned." I pray I may live long enough to complete that joyous work for our posterity.

As an example of her thoughtfulness, I took her to the emergency room in the Park City Hospital only last week when she was complaining of intense chest pain. I thought she may be having a heart attack, but it was only pericarditis, an inflammation of her heart lining, and I took home a regimen of anti-inflammatory medicine to treat it. Behind us in line came a middle-aged mother accompanied by her daughter. The mother was crying out in agonizing pain, gently holding her arm which we later discovered had been broken. Without even thinking, Patsy instructed me to let her go first in line ahead of us. And that's what happened. She always thought about someone else ahead of herself. It was instinctive with her, a reflexive act of charity.

We had a family gathering this last Sunday afternoon in our home. I had received permission from our bishop to offer her the sacrament after which we shared testimonies with each other. She was sedated for pain in her hospice bed, but even with her eyes closed, she said "Amen" when each one concluded, and she mouthed the words of the hymns we sang. It was a spiritual, peaceful outpouring of love for the Savior, the gospel and for each other. She loved every minute.

Then later that night she sat up, spoke with her beloved son, Andrew, who is a highly skilled surgeon. He told her he was concerned about her lungs. She said, "Yes, so am I." He asked her if she would like to return to the hospital for further testing to see if he could make her stronger. She said she would, and we packed her as gently as we could into the car.

That was the beginning of the end. They discovered three infectious sites in her body, including pneumonia in her lungs, none of which had been evident in her most recent blood workups. 

"Dad," whispered daughter Melanie early the next morning, "She's gone."

And with that simple notification she had left quickly, quietly and without disturbing anyone or being a burden to anyone - it was on her own terms and her own way.

People ask me how I'm holding up. The answer is also simple - I am being borne up as on the wings of angels all around me. They are my family, friends, and nearly everyone who has heard about her passing. And most of all, I am being sustained by my dearest Patsy who continues to minister to my needs in a higher and holier place.

 

Is That Fair?

I have been wondering of late what is fair. Many complain that what is happening to them is not fair. I hear people say it just isn't fair that so many seem to be doing better than they are. Others complain that life isn't fair. I heard someone this morning complaining at the check out counter that an item they were purchasing at the hardware store was not fairly priced. It seems everyone has a legitimate complaint about something, and much of the strife in the world can be traced to the inherent inequities we all confront.

The Christus

Imagine what a different world it would be if we accepted the premise that life just isn't fair. Trying to adjudicate fairness never seems to work out. What may seem fair to you will often not meet with another's definition. It's how arguments break out, even among family members and the best of friends. Isn't it curious how often we are put in a situation when what is perfectly reasonable to us may be unfair to the other party? Some are simply gifted musically, whereas others are not and couldn't carry a tune in a bucket if you handed them the bucket to make it easier. Some are stunningly beautiful, whereas the vast majority of us are just plain looking. Some have inherited vast sums of money, and appear to live with ease and prosperity through little or no effort on their part, whereas the world attests that the bulk of humankind is compelled to work hard for their living without the privilege of inherited wealth. How is any of this "fair?"

I confess I do not understand how anything associated with mortality is fair. Isn't that why it is a perfect laboratory? We are here to be tested, to be proven faithful, and to grow spiritually in the face sometimes of seemingly insurmountable odds. God's infinite and eternal plan of happiness depends upon us accepting the premise of fundamental unfairness. Parents sometimes favor one child over another, especially those who are inherently obedient and cheerful to be around. I often wonder if God has His favorite children. I'll bet He isn't unlike us - He has to love obedience in the face of obstacles and insurmountable odds. Is He always fair in the treatment of His children? Does He not promise "all that I have" to each repentant child? 

Christ in Gethsemane

Was anything fair about how the Savior was treated in morality? Was His crucifixion fair? Did He forgive those who murdered Him? As they drove nails into His hands, His wrists and His feet did anyone at the scene apply a fairness test of any kind?

He loves us "unconditionally," we often say to each other, but is that really true? There are conditions to inheriting all that the Father hath. He offers five laws to us, and invites us to covenant with Him to obey those laws: The law of obedience, the law of sacrifice, the law of the gospel, the law of chastity, and the law of consecration. We are promised that exactness and honor in keeping our covenants will keep us on the path leading to eternal life after our sojourn in mortality is complete. The crowning covenant is the sealing covenant between a man and a woman in one of the holy temples, and those children born into such a covenant home are said to be "born under the covenant." If there is fairness in this plan, it is that those who died before obtaining those blessings in mortality may have the opportunity for a full inheritance in the spirit world. We who remain here may obtain those blessings for our kindred dead through proxy representation for them, and they are free to accept that work and inherit exactly what we are promised.

Sometimes our journey in mortality is cut short by our calculations. I am not one of those whose life was shortened, indeed my recovery from debilitating brain surgery was declared a 100% cure and my life has been extended. It was nothing short of miraculous. Is it "fair" that my life continues where others' lives are ended prematurely? Is it fair that I had access to an extremely talented and experienced brain surgeon, where others may not have been so favorably situated? Are miracles handed out by God based on some unknown arbitration system? Can anyone apply? Who is blessed with a miracle, when others are not?

I for one can accept the fundamental inequities and seemingly unfair outcomes of mortality. I love to observe the way in which people grapple with their tests in life. I am inspired by the stories of those who overcome and produce positive examples for all the rest of us to emulate. 

As I watched the snow continue to pile up this winter, and continued to burn what seemed to be an inexorable pile of cash to plow the road leading to our home, there were times when I have to admit I became discouraged. Others chipped in to allay the burden it represented, but in my down moments I often reminded myself, "The sun always wins." I could extend that to, "The Son always wins." Indeed, the snow is yielding finally under the bright spring sun. 

Christ Conquered Death

And the Son's love and supreme example continues to shine down upon us poor mortals to warm us up, give us renewed hope of better days to come, and assure us of eternal life if we do our best to obey and to claim His redemptive sacrifice that wipes out our imperfections and all the unfairness we encounter.

I love the Savior Jesus Christ, come what may. He always wins.

Lessons Learned

I am not sure where you were a year ago today, but I was undergoing what would turn into a 12 1/2 hour surgery on my brain at the U of U Medical Center in Salt Lake City. COVID-19 had forced hospitals in to a "no visitor" restriction, so at 4:30 a.m. that morning my son dropped me off at the curb and I walked through the doors of the hospital to check in all alone.

COVID-19 proved to be a formidable foe to conquer. It was hard to get any information for my wife and family. They became concerned as the hours wore on into the early evening. What could be taking so long? Finally, they received a phone call from one of the residents who had been in the operating room, who reported that the surgeon, Dr. Schmidt, had been required to do a lot more "chipping and hammering" than he had originally thought he would. 

Um, yeah, when I heard that I thought someone might want to give that resident a few tips on his bedside manner with the wives of their patients, even though it was a phone call. Turns out my particular brain surgery for the removal of a meningioma tumor (benign) involved chiseling inside my skull to remove the tumor that had adhered to the inside of my skull in the frontal lobe. It involved a little artistic advanced carpentry for Dr. Schmidt, who was more than up to the task. My vision in my right eye had deteriorated to 20/50 because of the tumor's tentacles that were wrapped around the optic nerve, so that was delicate. I went back to the ophthalmologist for a follow-up recently, who confirmed what I had known for months - my sight was restored to 20/20.

In fact, that word "restored" is an apt description of what happened to me. All the symptoms and the deficiencies caused by the compression of the brain tissue by the tumor that I had encountered for years leading up to the diagnosis and the surgery have been eliminated. Bodily functions have returned to their pre-cancerous condition. My strength in body and limbs has been restored through rehabilitation and therapy. I can now bear witness in part what the resurrection might someday look like. I know what it is to come through the dark valley of the shadow of death and back up to the mountain top of hope and sunshine.

So, what of the lessons learned? President Russell M. Nelson suggested some lessons that we might have learned during this past year in his recent General Conference address. In addition there are many sobering lessons I have learned personally that will never be forgotten. Among them:

Carl Bloch, The Pool of Bethesda

1. Never underestimate the adversary, who will destroy you in a moment if he could. I was in a weakened state unlike anything I have ever experienced in my life. The doctors were pleased to inform me pre-surgery that their workup of my physical condition revealed that I had a strong heart and strong lungs. That was about all they could tell me that I was contributing to the operation. Everything else had been compromised. And Satan took full advantage of that reality. I was rescued more than once during my ordeal by ministering angels from the other side of the veil who strengthened me and protected me from the spirits who sought my destruction. I sensed there was a titanic struggle for my soul that was raging while I was so weak, and there was little I could do about it. The Savior is truly a Healer, as depicted above in Bloch's masterful painting.

2. The love we have for one another, though it may seem intangible and practically indiscernible on occasion, is in fact eternal in its nature and binds us to one another in every conceivable way. I came away from this year of isolation yearning for interaction with my family and friends. I plan to continue cherishing those relationships more than I ever have in the past. The restrictions of the COVID-19 pandemic, whether government- or self-imposed are gradually sliding into oblivion. Of course, some areas of the world are more affected than others, and we are grateful for where we are and we continue praying for nations like India where the pandemic continues to rage. I am grateful for the renewed perspective of love for others.

3. Enjoyment of the reality of home-based, Church-supported curriculum for our scripture study. This past year has seen the Church mature into a place I could only wish for many years ago when I lamented quietly and patiently in my personal journal that the Church seemed mired "in the thick of thin things," as Elder Neal A. Maxwell once expressed it. Today, we are a Christ-centered Church, and that development has been enhanced by the adversity we have passed through this last year. President Nelson saw it coming in the preparations and direction he gave for our home-based emphasis on gospel learning and application. The privilege of having the sacrament in our own homes while we were in isolation was profound and much appreciated. It has been years in the making, but it seems we are poised now to make major strides forward into the future with a laser-like focus on Christ's gospel.

4. I have learned never to take good health for granted. Recently, we were at dinner with two couples at a restaurant, something we haven't done for at least a year because of the pandemic. How rich that experience was for all of us. We are all of a certain age where it seems the main topic of conversation was health and wellness. One had recently had his third operation on a shoulder, after replacement surgeries on both hips and knees. The other had recently had a malignant skin cancer tumor removed from his neck, which followed three stents in his heart arteries that had saved his life. He joked that he's just giving up one body part at a time as he ages. We all had a story to tell, and that's what we all have to look forward to as we age. The law of entropy - that all things fail eventually - has never been more true. When you are young and vigorous, such thoughts of entropy are remote and seldom considered.

5. My love for my Savior has never been more full and complete. I was reminded of a great book that President Spencer W. Kimball wrote years ago entitled, Faith Precedes the Miracle. He is echoing the inspiration of Moroni, who wrote: ". . . it is by faith that miracles are wrought; and it is by faith that angels appear and minister unto men; wherefore, if these things have ceased wo be unto the children of men, for it is because of unbelief and all is vain." (Moroni 7:37). I have been rescued during this past year, beginning with my hours-long surgery one year ago today. I have never been so grateful for an outcome over which I had so little control. Just to be able to sit at my computer again and write the things of my soul is a gift of inestimable worth to me, all possible by the grace and goodness of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

"Give your best advice to the graduating seniors"

Goates Kids, Christmas Eve 2019

This last Christmas I was given the gift of Story Worth, a website that encourages subscribers to write their life story in bite sized pieces. Once a week I am given a topic by my family, who submit subjects they would like me to write about, and then those weekly missives will be collected and bound after a year. This week's topic was timely - "Give your best advice to the graduating seniors."

It’s the month of May, when the graduating seniors are heading out onto the vast uncharted ocean of opportunities ahead of them. They will leave behind the safety of their parents’ cocoon and learn new lessons of life. This year’s batch of high school graduates in our family includes Alex, Spencer and Molly. Rather than confine my comments just to them, I’ll invite all of you to read on as well.

There are websites that have collected all the wisdom of the world from many important and prestigious people. Those gems of wisdom are no doubt sagacious and many of those quotes form the backbone of most commencement speeches that will be given this month. But I am not one who seeks the wisdom of men as my source of advice to others.

1. Seek the Spirit. 

When Elder Bruce R. McConkie was called serve as a mission president in Melbourne, Australia, he decided they needed a mission motto. He took all his missionaries up to a nearby mountaintop and had them fast and pray together to come up with a motto they all liked and would live by. After discussing and offering up several suggestions, they agreed the most important thing they could do in their missionary experience was to seek the Spirit and to obey the Spirit’s promptings. 

As we became parents and discussed what we felt would be the best lesson we could teach our children, we concluded that if we could teach them to recognize and live by the voice of the Spirit our children would always be on the covenant path and would have the direction they needed to inherit eternal life. We did not believe in answering every question for our children. (I know that was frustrating for some.) We did not believe in holding ourselves up as the experts in everything. That would have been exhausting! Instead, we agreed together that our children would be able to navigate all of life’s challenges if they could obtain the priceless gift of the Holy Ghost. We knew we would not always be with them to counsel and guide them, and we also knew the Holy Ghost would be the only infallible guide in which they could trust unerringly in every situation. 

So my number one piece of advice is to seek the Spirit.

2. Read your patriarchal blessing frequently. 

Stake patriarchs are called to be seers to the people among whom they live. They have a direct pipeline to Heavenly Father through which you may obtain your own revelation about your life in mortality and beyond directly from God. It doesn’t matter who the man is that gives you a patriarchal blessing. You may rely upon whatever counsel and advice he gives as though you were receiving it straight from Heavenly Father. It isn’t a horoscope or a mystical magical incantation conjured up through hocus pocus or some other worldly means. It’s God’s personal invitation to you to do certain things with your life that will lead you, like the Spirit, toward eternal life. Treasure up your blessing and heed the counsel and warnings contained in it.

3. Gain all the experience you can in a variety of fields of endeavor. 

Be a generalist to start with, then hone in and focus on areas that you are most interested in as you decide which direction you will pursue in your life. Study and learn always. Never close the book on learning. Read a lot of books. Do a lot of different activities that take you beyond your comfort zone. Travel a lot if you can. Meet a lot of people. Date a lot of people, so that when you meet “the one” you’ll know her or him when you find them. Get sealed in the temple. Start a family. Don’t wait for something to come along at the “right” time when it’s convenient. Love can be messy and it might pop up at the very time you least expect it to. Don’t use a checklist of traits to apply to your future companion. Become the traits you most admire in another instead. Be engaged in doing good things for yourself and others.

In all that doing and getting and learning and exposing yourself to the world around you, make certain the things you are involved with square with what you know about the gospel of Jesus Christ. All knowledge is not the same. Some things are nice to know. Some things are important to know. And some things are absolutely essential to know. Learn to discern the differences between types of knowledge. Learn to be discerning in the sources you seek for learning. Not all the sources are reliable or can be weighted with equal value.

4. Lead others to Christ. 

Follow Christ and His teachings in your own life. A full-time mission isn’t for everyone, but it might be for you. That’s the easiest way to learn to love others and serve others. Do not discount the impact you might have on someone else. It may be many years in coming, but you will inevitably get a phone call someday from someone you touched in a way that might have seemed almost insignificant to you, but they will confirm whatever it was you did or said that had a profound effect upon them. You may have changed someone’s life without even knowing it. Read the Book of Mormon each day if you can. You will meet the Savior as He speaks to you directly from the inspired writings of the prophets. You can open the pages randomly, or you can study it chronologically or topically - it really doesn’t matter - and you will invariably find wisdom and answers to your prayers in miraculous ways.

President Russell M. Nelson

5. Follow the prophet. 

Whoever the man is that presides in this Church, the way of safety and happiness is to listen, study and pray about what the prophet has to say. President Russell M. Nelson is God's prophet on the Earth today. Look to him and the other Apostles for answers. There are no sustaining and inspired answers in politics. If you follow the opinions of men you will be tossed to and fro on the turbulent seas of men's wisdom. The only global politician in whom you can exercise your faith is the living prophet of God. 

* * *

I could go on, but five items is enough. Grandma reminded me when this topic for writing came up that at eighteen years of age we pretty well knew everything and didn’t really need much advice back then. She’s probably right about that. 

I love you all, and pray for your happiness and success in all you do.