Liberty, Freedom, Repentance and Exaltation

On this 4th of July, 2011, a message of liberation and freedom from sin on this wise: The atonement of Jesus Christ is infinite and eternal and more powerful than any of us has surmised.

In recent weeks, events in the lives of two younger brothers have done much to advise my beliefs and buttress my faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and the gift of personal revelation.

First, brother Hal suffered a massive coronary and the emergency installation of three stents in occluded arteries saved his life. The doctors who attended him estimated he was within minutes of death.

Lesley Drew Goates

Second, while we were all focused on Hal and praying for his recovery, brother Drew died in his sleep, ending a truncated life filled with challenges beyond the normal scope of most mortals.

I have always believed the gospel of Jesus Christ. I cannot remember a time when I did not have a testimony. I find as I have grown older the foundation of my testimony remains strong and is deepening and ripening. I have discovered new insights and perspectives I never imagined as new facets of my faith become exposed to the sunlight of truth.

If I were teaching from the Gospel Principles manual about what is required to obtain exaltation in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom, I would likely lay it out in an outline something like this:

Requirements for Exaltation

President Joseph Fielding Smith

The time to fulfill the requirements for exaltation is now (see Alma 34:32-34). President Joseph Fielding Smith said, "In order to obtain the exaltation we must accept the gospel and all its covenants; and take upon us the obligations which the Lord has offered; and walk in the light and understanding of the truth; and 'live by every word that proceedeth forth from the mouth of God'" (Doctrines of Salvation, 2:43).

To be exalted, we first must place our faith in Jesus Christ and then endure in that faith to the end of our lives. Our faith in him must be such that we repent of our sins and obey his commandments.

He commands us all to receive certain ordinances:

We must be baptized and confirmed a member of the Church of Jesus Christ.
We must receive the laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost.
We must receive the temple endowment.
We must be married for time and eternity.

In addition to receiving the required ordinances, the Lord commands all of us to --

Love and worship God.
Love our neighbor.
Repent of our wrongdoings.
Live the law of chastity.
Pay honest tithes and offerings.
Be honest in our dealings with others and with the Lord.
Speak the truth always.
Obey the Word of Wisdom.
Search out our kindred dead and perform the saving ordinances of the gospel for them.
Keep the Sabbath day holy.
Attend our Church meetings as regularly as possible so we can renew our baptismal covenants by partaking of the sacrament.
Love our family members and strengthen them in the ways of the Lord.
Have family and individual prayers every day.
Honor our parents.
Teach the gospel to others by word and example.
Study the scriptures.
Listen to and obey the inspired words of the prophets of the Lord.

Finally, each of us needs to receive the Holy Ghost and learn to follow his direction in our individual lives.

Discussion

Why are faith in and obedience to Jesus Christ necessary to become exalted?
What ordinances must we accept in order to become exalted?
What laws does the Lord give us that we must obey to become exalted?
Why must we learn to follow the direction of the Holy Ghost to become exalted?

After We Have Endured to the End

What happens when we have endured to the end in faithful discipleship to Christ? The Lord has said, "If you keep my commandments and endure to the end you shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God" (D&C 14:7). President Joseph Fielding Smith said, "If we will continue in God; that is, keep his commandments, worship him and live his truth; then the time will come when we shall be bathed in the fulness of truth, which shall grow brighter and brighter until the perfect day" (Doctrines of Salvation, 2:36). I would emphasize that everything we receive from God in the end is a GIFT, despite what we may think we deserve through our righteous endeavors under the law.

Joseph Smith

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught: "When you climb up a ladder, you must begin at the bottom, and ascend step by step, until you arrive at the top; and so it is with the principles of the Gospel -- you must begin with the first, and go on until you learn all the principles of exaltation. But it will be a great while after you have passed through the veil [died] before you will have learned them. It is not all to be comprehended in this world; it will be a great work to learn our salvation and exaltation even beyond the grave" (TPJS, 348).

Drew's final stop on his mortal journey was a modest burial plot in the Salt Lake City Cemetery amid the family members who preceded him in death -- my Grandfather Harold B. Lee, his two wives, Fern Lucinda Tanner Lee, Freda Joan Jensen Lee, Uncle Ernest L. Wilkins, Aunt Maurine Lee Wilkins, my mother Helen Lee Goates, and Drew's infant daughter Julie Goates. As I dedicated Drew's grave I was in awe with the revelation that flowed.

Somehow, in a way I may never fully comprehend, his mortal journey now at a merciful terminal point, Drew is on the path leading toward exaltation through little or no merit based upon his performance under the laws of the gospel as outlined above. He did the best he could, but his performance under the law fell woefully short during his mortal probation.

However, he repented for years through prodigious amounts of pain and suffering. I cannot judge the quality or the quantity of his sackcloth and ashes, but I know it was commensurate every day of his mortal probation with the magnitude of his sins.

It is not my intention here to detail his deficiencies, though they were many. There is no purpose to be served by an attempt to wash the dirty family laundry in this day of cyberspace truth telling. Suffice it to say the list of his sins would be comprehensive and infamous. Contrasted with the life of his illustrious grandfather, the 11th president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Drew's individual merits for exaltation would be woefully short of the minimum standard required for exaltation in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom.

President Harold B. Lee

If the truth were known, as the eldest grandson of Harold B. Lee, and speaking strictly for myself, I came to understand many years ago that I would never measure up -- the mountain was simply too high, the path too rocky and the topography too steep to ascend to his high and lofty station. Certainly, without any doubt, Drew shared similar sentiments. We all did. To be saved in the celestial kingdom alongside our grandfather is to have to chop some pretty tall timber. He seemed to be more than a mere mortal. Even after all these years one cannot tune into any General Conference, any speaker in any session, without a high probability of hearing a quote from Harold B. Lee.

Imagine a father, the son-in-law of Harold B. Lee, who was desperate to have his posterity measure up, to never deviate from the gospel plan, to keep the commandments with exactness and honor, to magnify their calling to the high and lofty station to which we were called as his posterity, and to live righteous lives within the fishbowl into which we were thrust by his high and holy calling so the whole membership of the Church could see our shining examples in nothing but good works.

Of course, it was a worthy goal, but proved impossible to achieve.

Imagine a president of the Church who fully understood the challenge, who warned us all that Satan desired to have us. "If he cannot get to me," he cautioned, "then he will do everything he can to get to me through all of you."

We were a small family. Grandfather and Nana had two daughters, Maurine and Helen. Between them ten grandchildren emerged. The results in living the laws of the gospel have been a mixed bag in varying stages of exactness and honor. Would that surprise anybody, knowing what you know about your own families? I will not presume to judge any of them, only to summarize that if we are all to be judged by the law without the sweet accompaniment of mercy, we are all doomed -- and I mean all of us.

We did not measure up. We did the best we could, all of us with our respective talents, tendencies, performances and desires, but I am certain all would agree, none of us deserves the high station through entitlement in the eternal worlds ahead that will be accorded Harold B. Lee. Not one of us.

President Thomas S. Monson

As I pronounced the dedicatory prayer over his grave, however, the words of President Thomas S. Monson were still resounding deep within my soul. The funeral cleansed me. The music was heavenly, a violin trio of family members performing "How Great Thou Art" and a male quartet singing "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing."

President Monson was a surprise visitor to Drew's funeral. He slipped into the Relief Society room just as my father was beginning the family prayer. He greeted us and bore a brief testimony after Dad's prayer had been concluded. He quipped to my perpetually shrinking father (now shriveled to about 5' 2" after starting at 6' 1"), "Well Brent, I'm still taller than you."

Then he stopped at one of the pews as he entered the chapel to greet a little grand-daughter, Jenna, who was standing on the bench watching him. He leaned over, taking her by the hands, "Watch my ears," he invited. They wiggled in matched symmetry, then he whispered with a twinkle in his eyes, "I only do that for little girls." (Not really true, because most of us priesthood men recall a General Priesthood Meeting when he did it for the whole Church).

What a gentle giant of love, unstinting service to all, and unmatched good humor. He spoke at the conclusion of the services for Drew. "I want you to know I feel part of the Goates family, the Lee family, and other families who have shown me the way, and I follow their teaching. They aren't gone, they're just away. I want to strive to be with them, and with Drew and with all, when He calls to go with them on high," he said simply in summary. Really? Did I hear that right? You hope to be with my unworthy prodigal brother someday? Did he just turn the requirements of the law on their ear and shake them all upside down with mercy? Was he saying the unworthy prodigal was now somehow more worthy than all of us who are left behind in mortality still toiling under the law? How thankful I am for a living prophet, the servant of all!

He came unannounced with hope, with love and with forgiveness in his heart to bless our grieving hearts. Such is the man and his mantle. The man is a living prophet, a prophet among prophets, a wonderful gift of love from our Heavenly Father to all His children who will accept him as a true servant, one willing to serve, to love, and to bless even the least among us.

As we now think upon the "awful arithmetic of the atonement" in the sweet afterglow of Drew's funeral, we stand in awe of those who lie buried in that hallowed little plot of dirt in the Salt Lake City Cemetery. There are two more still living whose mortal remains will someday take the last two remaining spots. In it all our hope is renewed that all in the family plot will come forth in the morning of the first resurrection, embrace one another and rejoice in the possibility of eternal life together.

Before that time comes, however, there will be ample opportunity for more sincere and wrenching repentance, for growth beyond the grave, and for progression. Because Drew had finally obtained the strait and narrow path in this life, according to his last bishop who also testified at the funeral, Drew will not fall off it again in the spirit world ahead. Don't think for one minute that grace is cheaply obtained, however. The glories of exaltation are not obtained on the cheap, nor are they offered at discount rates. Before he is resurrected Drew will pay the uttermost farthing in remorse.

But perhaps the most powerful lines came from daughter Katie when she wept, "Daddy, I forgive you for everything, and I hope that someday you will forgive me too."

Repentance and forgiveness -- keys to turn in the lock that release all the demons of hell who keep us bound in chains of guilt and remorse in the darkness of secret sins.

I believe there must be an unwritten law of commensurate suffering that attaches somehow to the infinite atonement, requiring accountability for individual sins, and almost unimaginable grief and sorrow for sins despite the promises the pain can be assuaged through accepting Christ's suffering. (See D&C 19).

In my younger brother I witnessed the fulfillment of the miracle of Christ's atonement, which thing I had never before supposed was possible because I had put unwarranted limitations on its magnitude.

When I see myself for what I really am, the unworthy prodigal rather than the righteous older brother, my vision expands and the light shines more brightly on the path of liberty, freedom, repentance and exaltation.

How grateful I am on this Independence Day to know it is possible for me to see Drew again if I live worthy enough. I want to be an eyewitness of his release from the prison of his broken physical body that entrapped his soaring spirit. Now freed from pain, addiction and sin, as I once knew him when he was an innocent child, I expect to be with him again. I have renewed hope and joy in the fulfillment of that promise.

May each of us realize that blessing for ourselves and those we love most.

Helen Lee Goates: A Retrospective at 85

Lee Family (l to r) Fern, Helen, Maurine, Harold

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  It's also the anniversary of my mother's 85th birthday.  She passed away in April, 2000.  She was 74 years old, and we celebrated a Thanksgiving Day birthday at her home in 1999, where she was surrounded by family.  We held her funeral the day before Easter, 2000.  Flowers were blooming, spring was in the air, and the promise of life's renewal was everywhere present. 

Since then, I've been gently cajoled several times to write something in tribute to her life.  I've deferred far too long.  Today seems like a good time to tickle the keyboard of my laptop and reminisce a bit.  Bear with me, please.

Mom was the second daughter of Harold B. Lee and Fern Lucinda Tanner Lee.  She was born on November 25, 1925.  They had two daughters and Auntie Mar was the elder of the two.  As a result they were a close family.  Mom and Auntie Mar learned how to play the violin and piano respectively, and during the years they grew up were constantly sharing their talents with others.  They played together in every single Mormon chapel in Salt Lake City in those years.

My memories of my childhood begin and end with our shared times with the Wilkins cousins.  It seems every holiday was spent with them.  Those two sisters were inseparable and so were we as their children.  They lived in Provo, we lived in Salt Lake.  The BYUtah rivalry was played out in backyards and driveways with hoops in both cities in every sport as we grew up.  It was mostly innocent fun, not nearly as "life and death" as it seems to be nowadays.  The saddest time of all was the parting -- we begged for "trading cousins" every time.

My mother was an exceptional homemaker.  I'm not certain how the divine plan worked the way it did.  These two exceptional mothers, daughters of a prophet, were saddled with eight boys among them and only two daughters -- one for each.  That they patiently bore our schemes and antics as boys is remarkable, since neither had much experience with boys until we came along.  Jane and Martsy, however, became the embodiment of their respective mothers.  They were the leaven in the lumps of clay -- the older and younger brothers who tormented them.  We might justly take at least some credit for the way they both turned out.  They are angels, polished and burnished in the rough and tumble of obnoxious brothers, no doubt.

Mom was resigned at some point, I suppose, to the need for help around the house.  As her oldest son, I was shown the finer points of homemaking.  That included washing windows, scrubbing floors, cleaning toilet bowls, sinks, bathtubs and showers, vacuuming and even ironing sheets!  Her philosphy, instilled within me at an early age was to always leave things better than I found them.  That carried over into my work in my career and the Church, and even when I was in airplane restrooms.  I always heard that little voice, "Leave it better than you found it," which included cleaning the basin and the small counter so it would be better for the next person.  Back in the day before "permapress" was invented she had a roller iron contraption and taught me how to iron the bedsheets by feeding them into the jaws of the hot iron pressed against the roller, controlled by foot pedals and hand controls.  It was an interesting invention to have to master, but we boys did it in turn.  Taking the wrinkles out with that flat iron gave one the sense of accomplishment and measurable improvement.  It was a lifelong lesson in satisfaction for having done something to improve the way I found it.

We had a "Behavior Record" that was posted on a prominent cupboard in the kitchen for all to see.  "Good marks" were scored at the top of the list, moving down -- 1 through 10 -- each week.  A brief description was written by Mom.  "Bad marks" were scored from the bottom up, blacking out the numbers and subtracting a penny for each "bad mark" registered.  That's how the allowances were paid, and of course, because Mom was the sole adjudicator of what was right and wrong in our home during the day, Dad was able to ascertain by a quick glance at the "scorecard" how well his sons were treating their mother and their siblings.  It wasn't always a pretty picture.

At home night on Monday evening the pennies were counted out.  For extra good behavior noted during the week a subjective star was awarded beside the measured good work, and sometimes for extra, extra good behavior two stars were awarded.  In the early stages the stars were worth nickels.  It was good to be good in our house!  As inflation ravaged the assumptions through the years, the stakes increased from pennies to nickels to dimes and quarters.  Remember, a Three Musketeers candy bar was only 5 cents!  I remember some adults talking about the end of the world when the price of candy bars got bumped to 10 cents!  Tithing lessons were taught early and often, and only the brightest, shiniest pennies were fit for tithing.

I loved reading with Mom at night.  We had a tradition called "Night up with Mother."  That meant in rotation one child got to stay up later than the other siblings and read with Mom.  She was a reading advocate when reading just wasn't that cool and there weren't any contests at school.  We read the classics.  She had a collection of books from which we read, including the Iliad and the Odyssey by Homer (among others) that remain among my treasured memories with her.  Mark Twain, Robert Louis Stevenson, J. M. Barrie, Robert Frost, even Mary Mapes and Charles Lutwidge Dodgson (Lewis Carroll) made the "play list."  The theater of the mind, as a result, is still more visual and valid to me than the movie or television screen, even though I was a child of the sixties raised on TV.

Perhaps my favorite part of the hot summer days was "Quiet Time," another Helen Lee Goates tradition.  She passed it off as a necessity to somehow stop the spread of polio.  I've never seen any authentication for that imperative medical prophylactic, but somehow she sold it to us as valid.  At any rate, we were called home in the heat of the day to pick up a book of our choosing and spend an hour in the shade reading.  I loved it.  I learned to love reading because of my Mother's invitations.

Mom was the perfect "ying" to Dad's "yang."  They complemented each other well.  Dad was the consummate hospital administrator and Church leader, gone from home a lot during those years, while Mom was the vigilant stay-at-home Mom -- always on scene and ever-present in our lives.  I became, she told me later, her confidant when Dad wasn't there to discuss whatever was troubling her that day.  It may be the origins of cooking up sibling strategies to keep two younger brothers in line, as she enlisted my support for her mothering.  I hope by now they've both forgiven my zeal for that assignment.  Before automatic dishwashers were in vogue, we would often do the dishes together -- she washed and I dried and we talked.  I'm not certain I had much wisdom to impart, but she told me years later what a good listener I had become.  If it's true, I learned it from Mom.  Once the remodeling of the kitchen was accomplished, the dishwasher replaced me and the long talks over dishes ended.

I remember lessons at the ironing board.  We ironed our own shirts and Levis -- yeah, you heard me -- Levis!  We used to put them on "pant stretchers" after washing them, then ironed out the wrinkles and put a crease in them.  Are you kidding me?  I swear it's all true!  She stayed up with me teaching me how to darn socks before I left for England on my mission, certainly a lost art today.  When I got to the mission field I was well-trained in all the necessary survival skills.  Everything she taught me was put to use.  Laundry was always a big item at our house, and learning how to do it was a necessity.  Folding clothes and putting them away were also part of the weekly rituals.  Looking back now, I realize I was raised as the daughter she never had to begin her mothering years.

President Boyd K. Packer

 No account of my relationship with my Mother would be complete without recalling the "apricot story."  I even got in on all the fruit bottling my Mother did in the fall.  President Packer in Teach Ye Diligently reminded us of how memorable the lesson was as a result of the story President Lee told about one of his daughters (Helen) and one of her sons (yours truly).  He described the power of the story this way:

For example, take the expression "everyone loves a story," and you may see what I mean. If you have a point to put across and can illustrate it with a story, all can be taught. If you tell it in simple terms, a youngster can understand it; at the same time the oldest person may draw a great lesson from it. That is one of the reasons the Lord taught in parables. By so doing, He was teaching everybody at once, but not all of them the same lesson.

Some time ago in a meeting the Brethren were discussing motion pictures, specifically those that would strengthen the family. Someone mentioned one featuring President Harold B. Lee. "Which one?" someone asked. "There were many produced in which he appeared." One of the Brethren identified it simply by saying, "You know, the one about apricots."

Everyone nodded. That identified the film from all of the others. Why? Because in it President Lee had told an incident about his daughter canning apricots. Not wanting to be interrupted, she had almost put off her little boys who wanted help with their prayers. "But, Mommy, what is more important," one of them had asked, "prayers or apricots?"

In that film President Lee had lectured forcefully on strengthening the home, but the film is remembered as the "apricot" film. We may have missed other things, but we all got that message. Each of us was alike in remembering that.  (Boyd K. Packer, Teach Ye Diligently, 124-25).

Thankfully, the more feminine part of my nature was supplanted with the blessed arrival of a cherished daughter!  All that "girlie stuff" programming gradually gave way once Jane finally arrived.  "Elizabeth Jane," she named her -- after Queen Elizabeth of Great Britain.  It was during the 50s, and the royal family was greatly admired and held up as role models in America.  I was routinely reminded of my mother's affinity for the Queen and Prince Charles, since they had been pregnant with each of us at the same time.  My mother was heartbroken when news of his antics spread a few years ago.  She anguished for the Queen.  But the monarchy survived apparently, as new hope arises in the announcement of Prince William's engagement and his logical succession to the throne someday when Queen Elizabeth passes.  That has to tell you something about how long the Queen has been on the throne of England!

Mom was a role model among women.  They loved her for her example of righteous and concecrated motherhood and womanhood.  She was a leader among her peers, serving as the Relief Society president twice in the Federal Heights Ward, then on the General Board (twice) later in life.  After that assignment concluded she was surprised by a call to serve late in life as the stake Young Women's President.  When the call came to her, she asked, "Don't you mean Relief Society?" because that was all she had ever known.  She was assured they hadn't made a mistake and she served for three years, seeking to "spiritualize" the young women in her stake.

When she contracted ovarian cancer, she quickly arranged a dinner for her children and their companions at her home.  The diagnosis hadn't been announced, but she had a premonition something wasn't quite right.  When the diagnosis was confirmed, she was trying to pull her family back together again.  We had a three-and-one-half year protracted farewell with her.  Major surgeries and chemotherapy extended her life.  She did all she could to heal the inevitable rifts among us.  We learned to love and forgive one another because of her example.  One by one on her death bed we spent time as she quietly gave her final counsel to each.

I love my Mother.  I continue to feel her influence.  She had a way with me, and she took full advantage.  Whenever I was tempted to lie to her, she would take my face in her gentle hands and say firmly but gently, "Now David, look me in the eyes and tell me the truth."  She was the perfect combination of velvet and steel.  I couldn't ever get away with anything, it seemed.  She could pierce through my eyes into my very soul.  Nothing escaped her.  I realize now it was the power of a righteous life that aided her.  Discernment came easily to her.  She was on familiar terms with her Father in Heaven.  Her testimony of her Savior was unwavering.  Her influence, her words, her gentle touch and her inspiration continue to affect me.  I am confident there is nothing in my life of which she is unaware.  She continues to minister among us.


President Thomas S. Monson

So on the eve of this next Thanksgiving Day, falling as it does on her birthday once again, I pause to give thanks for my beloved Mother, Helen Lee Goates.  On the back of her funeral program we reprinted a letter she had written for the time capsule that was sealed in 1980.  President Thomas S. Monson quoted from that letter in a talk titled, "If Ye Are Prepared Ye Shall Not Fear," when he beautifully described her passing at a General Relief Society meeting in 2004, in these words:

As I conclude my remarks, may I share with you an experience of several years ago which depicted the strength of you dear sisters in Relief Society.

During 1980, the sesquicentennial year of the organization of the Church, each member of the Relief Society general board was asked to write a personal letter to the sisters of the Church in the year 2030 — 50 years hence. The following is an excerpt from the letter written by Sister Helen Lee Goates:

“Our world of 1980 is filled with uncertainty, but I am determined to live each day with faith and not fear, to trust the Lord and to follow the counsel of our prophet today. I know that God lives, and I love Him with all my soul. I am so grateful that the gospel was restored to the earth 150 years ago and that I can enjoy the blessings of membership in this great Church. I am grateful for the priesthood of God, having felt its power throughout my life.

“I am at peace in my world and pray that you may be sustained in yours by firm testimonies and unwavering convictions of the gospel of Jesus Christ.”

Helen Lee Goates passed away in April of the year 2000. Shortly before her impending death from cancer, Sister Monson and I visited with her and her husband and family. She appeared calm and at peace. She told us she was prepared to go and looked forward to seeing once again her parents and other loved ones who had preceded her. In her life Sister Goates exemplified the nobility of Latter-day Saint women. In her passing she personified your theme: “If ye are prepared ye shall not fear.”

She was well prepared for her death when she quietly slipped away.  I pray it might be said of me and all of us.