"Where Will This Lead?"

President Dallin H. Oaks

These days I come home from Church on a Sunday to an empty (and this morning), a very cold one. I long for our post-Woodland Ward Sunday chats together. Now I have no one to talk to, so once again I take up my “pen” to share with all of you.

I’ve been pondering a talk that provides my chapter heading. It was given by President Dallin H. Oaks at the General Priesthood Meeting in April 2019. He could not possibly have known then what I am presently contemplating as I undertake my estate planning venture. However, when I returned home just now, I was compelled to find that talk and share it with all of you. He said:

“Our present and our future will be happier if we are always conscious of the future. As we make current decisions, we should always be asking, ‘Where will this lead?’

“Some decisions are choices between doing something or doing nothing…

“The decisions I have just described involve choices between taking some action or taking no action at all. More common are those choices between one action or another. These include choices between good or evil, but more frequently they are choices between two goods. Here too it is desirable to ask where this will lead. We make many choices between two goods, often involving how we will spend our time. There is nothing bad about playing video games or texting or watching TV or talking on a cell phone. But each of these involves what is called ‘opportunity cost,’ meaning that if we spend time doing one thing, we lose the opportunity to do another. I am sure you can see that we need to measure thoughtfully what we are losing by the time we spend on one activity, even if it is perfectly good in itself…

“Take the long view. What is the effect on our future of the decisions we make in the present? Remember the importance of getting an education, studying the gospel, renewing our covenants by partaking of the sacrament, and attending the temple.

“‘Where will this lead?’ is also important in choosing how we label or think of ourselves. Most important, each of us is a child of God with a potential destiny of eternal life. Every other label, even including occupation, race, physical characteristics, or honors, is temporary or trivial in eternal terms. Don’t choose to label yourselves or think of yourselves in terms that put a limit on a goal for which you might strive.

“My brethren, and my sisters who may view or read what I say here, I hope you know why your leaders give the teachings and counsel we give. We love you, and our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, love you. Their plan for us is the ‘great plan of happiness’ (Alma 42:8). That plan and Their commandments and ordinances and covenants lead us to the greatest happiness and joy in this life and in the life to come. As servants of the Father and the Son, we teach and counsel as They have directed us by the Holy Ghost. We have no desire other than to speak what is true and to encourage you to do what They have outlined as the pathway to eternal life, ‘the greatest of all the gifts of God’ (Doctrine and Covenants 14:7)…

“Brethren, we make countless choices in life, some large and some seemingly small. Looking back, we can see what a great difference some of our choices made in our lives. We make better choices and decisions if we look at the alternatives and ponder where they will lead. As we do, we will be following President Russell M. Nelson’s counsel to begin with the end in mind. For us, the end is always on the covenant path through the temple to eternal life, the greatest of all the gifts of God.

“I testify of Jesus Christ and of the effects of His Atonement and the other truths of His everlasting gospel in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.” (https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2019/04/35oaks?lang=eng) (emphasis mine).

I am constantly reminded that my life today is the sum total of all the choices I made as I believe they were prompted by the Holy Ghost. There is nothing I can do today about those decisions of yesterday, and there are too many to count. But for each of you with many more years ahead of you than behind you, my counsel is to seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost in all you are doing. The decision-making process accelerates dramatically once you have graduated from high school. Please remember there is no calendar, deadline, or timetable for any of us. Be patient.

My One and Only True Love

My son Jeff asked me the other day why I hadn’t started my estate planning process many, many years ago instead of waiting so long. I didn’t have an immediate answer for him then, but maybe it’s because I am “ponderous” in my approach. (I’m being generous). Maybe I just procrastinated. The time for imminent decisions is now upon me, ready or not. Whatever the reasons for delay, I am now undertaking the process once again with a prayer in my heart that I will be guided by revelation from heaven.

I looked again the other night at the picture that was snapped at our wedding reception on December 19, 1969. I was reminded forcefully that all the people pictured except me are ministering spirits, now living in the spirit world as ministering angels. Then the realization hit me that Patsy may be the best of them all to influence my thinking and my choices going forward from here. I am the only one in that picture who is left still living in the flesh on earth. It’s humbling to me, beyond your imagination. I am writing my benediction to all I held dear and sacred for a lifetime, and I earnestly hope my efforts will be met with the best possible outcomes for all of us.

Certainly, the question looming before me is, “Where will this lead?”