Fathers Matter

 I have been focused this morning on the 12 fathers in our extended family in the next generation, and the three additional fathers in the generation after that. I am deeply humbled by how they have far exceeded my performance as a father, as I look back on all the years since we were married. In every particular they have excelled and continue to bless the lives of their wives and their children.

It is characteristic of this generation, perhaps, that when circumstances get difficult too many fathers abandon their families and move away from their responsibilities and seek what may appear to be easier paths. However, for those who keep after it and stay the course, there are immeasurable blessings in store both here in this life and in the life eternal beyond.

Last week we attended an endowment session in the Jordan River Temple, and then two sealing sessions after that. We were reminded by one of the sealers that perhaps we all knew each other in the pre-existence, and we may have met people who knew their time on earth would not come at a time when the fulness of the gospel ordinances would be available to them. Perhaps they approached us in the pre-existence and asked us to do that proxy ordinance work for them. We readily agreed, and week by week we go now and perform that ministering labor on their behalf. Will they accept our efforts? Of course they will. They are our progenitors. We have the fulness of the gospel among us in this dispensation, and we are their seed. Embedded in our souls is the spiritual DNA we inherited from them. In that session I offered the observation to the group that had come to me just that morning as we sat pondering the scriptures in the chapel before the endowment session began. I read in Moses in the Pearl of Great Price:

And it came to pass, as the voice was still speaking, Moses cast his eyes and beheld the earth, yea, even all of it; and there was not a particle of it which he did not behold, discerning it by the Spirit of God.

And he beheld also the inhabitants thereof, and there was not a soul which he beheld not; and he discerned them by the Spirit of God; and their numbers were great, even numberless as the sand upon the sea shore. (Moses 1:27-28).

I also suggested this process might be similar to that which the Savior surely must have experienced in the Garden of Gethsemane when He suffered alone for the sins of everyone, even for all the souls on all the worlds on which they had lived and He created, "worlds without end." The atonement is individual and it is infinite and eternal. It touches everyone with the exclusion of no one, and He knows each of us personally. He knows our names, and He knows our circumstances. He loves us and He will succor us individually as we reach out for His help. We are never left alone and we are never left comfortless. It's the reason we have a prophet in our midst who is pleading for us to cultivate our relationship with God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, and to get on and to stay on the covenant path.

"For behold, this is my work and my glory - to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39).

So, on this Fathers Day 2022, let me offer my congratulations to all the fathers who are doing their best to honor their covenants and to help their children find and then stay on the covenant path. It is a great work in this generation to do the work of bringing to pass the mortality of children, and to work in the gospel harness with God the Father and Jesus Christ who will add to our work their work of immortality and eternal life.

If you are one who is seemingly on the brink of walking away, I encourage you to stay the course, pray for the help to sustain you, and seek professional help if needed. There is nothing "out there" to surpass your role as father in the lives of your children. They will repay you a hundred fold in the years ahead.

Mothers in the Patriarchal Order of the Priesthood

Many years ago when I served on the high council, our bishop invited me to speak to our ward on the topic of The Patriarchal Order of the Priesthood. It was Fathers' Day. When I stood to speak, the clock said I had less than three minutes before the scheduled end of the meeting. I briefly bore my testimony and said I would come back and give that talk someday.

Last week at the end of the meeting block, I was approached by the executive secretary who said the bishopric had requested that I be the concluding speaker for our upcoming Mothers' Day program. I was asked, not surprisingly, to center my remarks around mothers. My mind immediately flashed back to that Fathers' Day, and I knew instantly what I would say. I'll make it easy for anyone to use all of this in whole or in part if you have a similar assignment on Mothers' Day or Fathers' Day.

My topic for Mothers' Day is the same as it would have been for Fathers' Day. My desire is to teach the doctrine so plainly and simply that no one can possibly misunderstand. The words of prophets I will cite are my own words. The doctrine has governed our lives since the day Patsy and I first discussed the possibility of marriage.

Joseph Smith

Joseph Smith taught there were three orders of the priesthood: Levitical (Aaronic), Patriarchal and Melchizedek. When a man and a woman kneel across an altar in a temple from each other, they are conditionally admitted into the patriarchal order of the priesthood known as the new and everlasting covenant of marriage. If they are true and faithful to their covenant, the time will come when they are given the unconditional promise of eternal life.

The name of this priesthood order should be obvious because patriarch means father. There are no fathers without mothers and there are no mothers without fathers. In this way couples receive their formative lessons in Godhood and take their first steps together toward returning to full fellowship with God.

In the celestial glory there are three heavens or degrees; and in order to obtain the highest, a man must enter into this order of the priesthood [meaning the new and everlasting covenant of marriage]; and if he does not, he cannot obtain it. He may enter into the other, but that is the end of his kingdom; he cannot have an increase. (D&C 131:1-4).

Elder John A. Widstoe

In other words, he has no kingdom that can grow and increase by the power of the seeds worlds without end. The power of the fullness and continuation of the procreative seeds forever is at the very core of Godhood. Elder John A. Widstoe said, “The government of heaven is by families. It is patriarchal.” (Gospel Interpretations: Aids to Faith in a Modern Day [Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1947], 100).

I am aware, intimately and personally, there are both men and women who for reasons not of their choosing are unable to enter into the new and everlasting covenant of marriage while in this life. Also, there are many who are unable to bear children here and now. A long succession of living prophets in this dispensation has promised faithful saints in this condition they will be denied none of the blessings I shall mention. There are no expiration dates on priesthood blessings and promises if faithful observance of covenants is in evidence.

It is written of those who do enter into the patriarchal order and faithfully keep all the laws, rites and ordinances pertaining thereto:

. . .they shall pass by the angels, and the gods, which are set there, to their exaltation and glory in all things, as hath been sealed upon their heads, which glory shall be a fulness and a continuation of the seeds forever and ever. Then shall they be gods, because they have no end. . . . This is eternal lives. . . (D&C 132:19-24).

Exaltation is nothing less than the fullness and continuation of the seeds of procreation forever and ever. The continuation of lives has no end, even eternal lives. Exaltation requires eternal parenthood, eternal parenthood requires eternal marriage.

President Joseph F. Smith

In 1913, President Joseph F. Smith said:

The house of the Lord is a house of order and not a house of confusion; and that means, that the man is not without the woman in the Lord, neither is the woman without the man in the Lord; and that no man can be saved and exalted in the kingdom of God, without the woman, and no woman can reach the perfection and exaltation in the kingdom of God, alone. That is what it means. God instituted marriage in the beginning, he made man in his own image and likeness, male and female, and in their creation it was designed that they should be united together in sacred bonds of marriage, and one is not perfect without the other.

Furthermore, it means that there is no union for time and eternity that can be consummated outside of the law of God, and the order of his house. Men may desire it, they may go through the form of it in this life, but it will be of none effect except it be done and sanctioned by divine authority, in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost. (CR, April 1913, 118-19, emphasis mine).

It is important to understand that those who enter the new and everlasting covenant of marriage are not covenanting to keep the commandments in general. They have already made those covenants in the waters of baptism. When entering the patriarchal order of the priesthood together in the new and everlasting covenant of marriage, the bride’s and groom’s promises are much more specific; they promise to keep laws, rites and ordinances that pertain to marriage.

President Joseph Fielding Smith

In 1972, President Joseph Fielding Smith emphasized:

There is nothing that will ever come into your family life that is as important as the sealing blessings of the temple and then keeping the covenants made in connection with this order of celestial marriage. (Ensign, July 1972, 27).

Obviously, we must take such sacred promises seriously and think deeply and honestly about their meaning and import. What are the laws, rites and ordinances of marriage?

The first marriage was performed by God when he joined Adam and Eve together. (See Genesis 2:20-24). Note that Eve is called Adam’s “wife.” This was an eternal marriage, as they were both infinite and eternal beings at the time.

The Law of Marriage

What was the great commandment or law given to Adam and Eve? (See Genesis 1:26-27). It was to “multiply and replenish.” The word “replenish” should be translated “fill.” (See Genesis 1:28, footnote “c;” note also verse 22 where the same Hebrew verb is used interchangeably).

God commanded them to multiply. This law applies to all who enter the order of marriage. This is the first and great law of marriage -- we are commanded to multiply and fill the earth, that we might have joy in our posterity. Imagine that! We are commanded to be joyful!

President Ezra Taft Benson

In 1988, President Ezra Taft Benson testified:

I can assure that the greatest responsibility and the greatest joys in life are centered in the family, honorable marriage, and rearing a righteous posterity. (Ensign, May 1988, 52).

The Rite of Marriage

What is the rite or ritual that applies to marriage? It is the rite or ritual of “sexual union,” or “the passing of the seed.” Many will say sexual relations between a man and a woman can easily be accomplished outside the bounds of marriage and it is perfectly legal under the laws of the land, because we see that fact played out on TV nearly every night. Adultery, fornication and homosexuality are rampant, perfectly acceptable and legal in society today, but sexual relations between unmarried men and women are forbidden by God regardless of whatever societal norms or the laws of the land may permit.

Furthermore, we understand God eternally accepts and ratifies only an eternal marriage when men, women and children are sealed by his authority, and only that marriage will continue to retain the priesthood power of the seeds forever if they remain faithful. (See D&C 132:15-24).

President Spencer W. Kimball

In 1975, President Spencer W. Kimball taught:

We do not raise children just to please our vanity. We bring children into the world to become kings and queens, and priests and priestesses for our Lord. (In General Conference Report, Buenos Aires Area Conference 1975, 26).

The Ordinance of Marriage

Now a word about the ordinance we covenant to observe and obey in this order of marriage. The law is to multiply by the rite of holy sexual union to form a living soul, so the ordinance associated with marriage should be obvious.

Birth is the first great ordinance of this life, or the first “living endowment” of this life. Truly, this is a most wondrous and miraculous ordinance. In this holy ordinance a spirit child of God is endowed with a physical body. This physical body must be obtained in order to have all “power over those who have not.” (See TPJS, 181). This physical body is necessary to receive a fullness of joy. (See D&C 93:33-34). This physical body is a prerequisite to becoming a God. (See D&C 130: 22). This physical body is the main object of our coming to earth. (See TPJS, 181). We will each take this physical body with us into the eternities by observing and keeping the priesthood ordinance of resurrection. (See JD 15:137; D&C 88:15-16, 27-29). It is hard to imagine a holier priesthood ordinance in this world than the first priesthood ordinance we call birth.

President Kimball glories in the possibilities of motherhood:

Mothers have a sacred role. They are partners with God, as well as with their own husbands, first in giving birth to the Lord’s spirit children, and then in rearing those children so they will serve the Lord and keep his commandments. Could there be a more sacred trust than to be a trustee for honorable, well-born, well-developed children? (TSWK, 326).

President George Albert Smith

In 1907, President George Albert Smith:

How will those feel who fail to obey that first great command when they stand in the presence of the creator, who says to them, as He said to those of olden times, “Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not for of such is the kingdom of heaven.” How can they comply with that invitation if they have no children to take to the Father? . . . I realize there are some men and women who are grieved because they are not fathers and mothers, they are not blessed of the Lord in that particular, they have no children of their own, and by no fault of their own. I believe the Lord will provide in such cases. (CR, October 1907, 38).

President Joseph Fielding Smith:

If the responsibilities of parenthood are willfully avoided here, then how can the Lord bestow upon the guilty the blessings of eternal increase? It cannot be, and they shall be denied such blessings. (The Way to Perfection, 239).

President Brigham Young

President Brigham Young:

There are multitudes of pure and holy spirits waiting to take tabernacles, now what is our duty? -- To prepare tabernacles for them; to take a course that will not tend to drive those spirits into the families of the wicked, where they will be trained in wickedness, debauchery, and every species of crime. It is the duty of every righteous man and women to prepare tabernacles for all the spirits they can. (Discourses of Brigham Young, John A. Widstoe [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1941], 197).

The daughters of God are under covenant just as much as the sons of God to keep his commandments, and to diligently perform their assigned duties on earth. The Doctrine and Covenants says the daughters of God are given in marriage to the sons of God

. . . to multiply and replenish the earth, according to my commandment, and to fulfill the promise which was given by my Father before the foundation of the world, and for their exaltation in the eternal worlds, that they may bear the souls of men; for herein is the work of my Father continued, that he may be glorified. (D&C 132:63).

God’s work and glory is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. (See Moses 1:39). He cannot bring to pass the immortality of man if his mortal sons and daughters thwart the work of bringing to pass the mortality of man. This is not an idle cliché we hear frequently in the Church, nor has the doctrine been outdated by the current conditions of a godless society. The prophets have consistently laid stress on our part of the work and glory of God.

Elder Melvin J. Ballard

Elder Melvin J. Ballard said:

There is a passage in our Scriptures which the Latter-day Saints accept as divine: “This is the glory of God -- to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” Likewise we could say that this is the glory of men and women -- to bring to pass the mortality of sons and daughters of God, to give earth-life to the waiting children of our Father. . . The greatest mission of woman is to give life, earth-life, through honorable marriage, to the waiting spirits, our Father’s spirit children who anxiously desire to come to dwell here in this mortal state. All the honor and glory that can come to men or women by the development of their talents, the homage and the praise they may receive from an applauding world, worshipping at their shrine of genius, is but a dim thing whose luster shall fade in comparison to the high honor, the eternal glory, the ever-enduring happiness that shall come to the woman who fulfills the first great duty and mission that devolves upon her to become the mother of the sons and daughters of God. The jewels in her crown, the stars that still glisten in her diadem, in time and in eternity, shall be the sons and the daughters to whom, through the blessing of the Lord, she has been instrumental in not only giving earth-life, but in bringing them, through care and devotion and faithfulness, into the paths that God has appointed for his children to follow. . . (Sermons and Missionary Services of Melvin J. Ballard, 203-4).

The prophets have been consistently clear on this important doctrine throughout the entire dispensation. They have taught, counseled and warned the saints these truths have eternal ramifications, and that the saints will be blessed if they are faithful to their covenants. Joseph Smith prophesied “the day would come when none but the women of the Latter-day Saints would be willing to bear children,” and his words are sadly coming to pass. (See Joseph Smith The Prophet, Truman G. Madsen, 39).

I plead with you, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, to stand with truth, stand with God, stand with the leaders of the Church, teach the doctrine I have outlined here boldly and without apology amid the evils and sophistries of man in this wicked world. Reach out in love and patience to those who are blinded by the craftiness of others and have gone astray, restore unto them their sight of these promises and blessings and the hope of eternal life.

No matter how unpopular or inconvenient it may become, the priest and priestess must be diligent in their respective duties, if the couple is to obtain the exaltation the Lord has promised those who keep the laws, rites and ordinances of marriage in the patriarchal order of the priesthood. These solemn promises and covenants are most sacred. Of the reality of the Author of these truths I humbly testify.

Being Dad

People always wonder how their fathers did it all, until they become fathers themselves. Enjoy this video to remind yourselves how it happened for you:

Fathers Day and Abrahamic Tests

With all the political chatter recently, Fathers Day 2010 slipped past without so much as a whisper from me, but there were some thoughts I captured four years ago that are worth preserving here.  The following is taken from my journal of that day:

On Sunday morning, Father's Day, 2006, I awoke with three distinct "bullet points" for my upcoming talk about service in the Woodland Ward that day. In the mercy of the Lord, and yet another demonstration of the marvelous economy of the Spirit, it seemed a personal message to me in addition to forming the foundation for what I was to say in my talk.

Here are the three points, lest they be forgotten:

1. Do not fear the hike up the mountain of preparation.
2. Embrace the Abrahamic tests in your life.
3. Accept the invitation to come in at the front gate of the church of the Firstborn.

Having just finished that fabulous book about Abraham, The Blessings of Abraham, by E. Douglas Clark, I suppose my reading must have laid the foundation for my talk -- all I got early in the morning was the outline.  It was left to me to fill in the detail around those three points.  (That's not a misprint on the price, but it's worth every penny, trust me).

I began by expressing the wish to elevate our thinking about service. I suggested that no one is opposed to the notion that service is a desirable trait for all disciples to have. I started discussing Abraham's preparations for answering the call to be prepared for the complete consecration of his life by answering the call to go to the land of Moriah to a mountain he was told he would be shown to sacrifice his only son.

It was a three day journey. He began immediately to make the preparations, and he did as he was told to do -- cut the wood for the pier upon which Isaac was to be offered.

Imagine the thoughts that went through his mind on that three day journey. Imagine what Isaac was thinking. What is unknown from the account in Genesis is what Sarah was thinking. Imagine that faith on the part of all three! Because he knew God was in it, he did not hesitate.

He was led by the Spirit to Mount Moriah (what is today known in Jerusalem as the Temple Mount where the Dome of the Rock now sits). His preparation and his willingness to carry out the required sacrifice is what tested him to the limit.

Joseph Smith once said if there had been a more severe test God could have devised to thoroughly try the heart of Abraham, God would have given Abraham that test instead. The whole idea of Abrahamic tests in our lives is to test the depth of our commitment to God -- to infuse us with the desire to consecrate our lives to God's work.

In order to serve our fellowmen, it would seem, each of us must bow to the demands of consecration -- the sacrifice of all earthly things and desire.  Simultaneously, we are offering the only thing to God that is truly ours to give -- our free will.

These are high and holy objectives, even "dangerous doctrines" in the eyes of some. But that was the example Abraham set before us as aspiring disciples.

Then I suggested each of us would have similar tests if we sought fellowship with the saints of former ages. How would you feel if invited to sit down to dinner one night with luminaries like Noah, Abraham, Melchizedek, Alma, Paul, Elijah, and others like them if in your own right you had not been willing to offer the same commitment they demonstrated? To think we would someday inherit an equal portion with them without a similar measure of sacrifice would be haughty indeed! I can't imagine meeting Paul someday in the realms ahead, but when I do I want to be able to look him in the eye, shake his hand, and feel adequate.  That's all.  And I realize only the atonement of Christ can level that playing field for me. 

I know I'm not even a freckle on Paul's nose, but through Christ and His sanctifying blood I want to at least be able to hug him without being embarrassed at my lack.

When those Abrahamic tests come to each of us (and surely they do), I suggested rather than blame God for our hardships and trials, we must embrace the chastening and accept the tutorial as a gift from God to help reveal ourselves to ourselves. Finding God in the fiery furnace is what it appears to be all about.

To conclude, I suggested that fellowship in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, begins at the gate of baptism. Fellowship in the church of the Firstborn, however, is outlined in D&C 76, and is found beyond the gates of the temple within in the covenants we make there.

Many come in at the gate to the outward Church (capital "C"), but few seem to find the fellowship of the inward church (lower case "c") outlined in the revelations.

Like these outward ordinances God offers to us with a promise of someday obtaining as joint heirs with Christ all that He possesses, too many members of the Church conclude that nominal membership in the Church is all there is, never looking beyond and deeper into what can only be termed as the "mysteries of godliness," which I feel I am just beginning to understand in part (I'm slow).

I suggested there is a church within a Church we must each discover by doing the works of Abraham, embracing his example and following the same path he laid out for us. Abraham and Sarah represent the path of true discipleship in modeling concern, service and lovingkindness for all our Father in Heaven's children. This awareness is anchored in humility, kindness and love for others.

I remembered that years ago during the time of President Lee, President Kimball and President Benson, the prophets used to answer the reporters' questions about why the Church wasn't doing more to lift the burdens of the millions around the earth who were suffering with expressions that we simply didn't have the resources to do as much as we would like, although we would do more if we had the resources. Now we do.

I concluded with these inspired words from President Hinckley:

"In the last ten years we have supplied in cash and commodities hundreds of millions of dollars in humanitarian aid to those not of our faith.
"We have traveled the earth bearing witness of this, the work of the Almighty. During these same years I personally have traveled nearly a million miles visiting some 70 countries. My beloved companion traveled with me until a year ago when she passed away on the 6th of April. It has been lonely since then.
"Our hope concerning the future is great and our faith is strong.
"We know that we have scarcely scratched the surface of that which will come to pass in the years that lie ahead." (Ensign, May 2005, 4).

When it comes to service, we have barely begun as a Church and individuals to do the works of Abraham. We must enlist all "our substance" (as King Benjamin described it -- not just money) but everything we have and are, or ever will have or be, to fulfill that ideal to truly consecrate our lives for the building up of the kingdom of God on earth and for the establishment of Zion.

I don't know if anyone else in the audience learned anything in that talk, but I know the Lord certainly enlarged and expanded my vision.

On another occasion, President Hinckley reminded us: "We must reach out to all mankind. They are all sons and daughters of God our Eternal Father, and He will hold us accountable for what we do concerning them. . . May we bless humanity with an outreach to all, lifting those who are downtrodden and oppressed, feeding and clothing the hungry and the needy, extending love and neighborliness to those about us who may not be part of this Church." (Ensign, November 2001, 6).

I concluded by testifying there is a living prophet among us. He is no small thinker, this man Gordon B. Hinckley. Indeed, he is a man like Abraham, and we can do no less if we would claim our own place with them in the church of the Firstborn. As "firstborns" in the church of THE Firstborn, only by doing the works of Abraham will we claim our rightful place as a joint heir with Jesus Christ, the Firstborn Son, inheriting all that the Father hath.

Now that he's gone, I could easily say the same of his successor, President Thomas S. Monson, whose example of Christian service and love for his fellowmen knows no boundaries.  Said he recently:

"I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and figuratively lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish — and in effect save their lives."  ("What Have I Done For Someone Today?", Ensign, November 2009, 84-87).

And yes, these are all thoughts beyond my feeble attempts to understand or adequately explain, underscoring the source of it all.

I have always loved the words of Nephi.  Some have called it "the psalm of Nephi:"

“My soul delighteth in the things of the Lord; and my heart pondereth continually upon the things which I have seen and heard," Nephi stated. (2 Nephi 4:16).

And yet, as all of us have sinned and "come short of the glory of God," (see Romans 3:23) Nephi, too, explored those feelings:

"Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily best me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted." (2 Nephi 4:17-19).

Through all of the trials and tribulations Nephi had been through, he had come to know the Lord. "And having seen many afflictions in the course of my days, nevertheless, having been highly favored of the Lord in all my days; yea, having had a great knowledge of the goodness and the mysteries of God..."

Nephi truly does know the Lord. He has seen him (2 Nephi 11:2,3). He has been taught by angels many times. He has been supported and strengthened by the Lord through the terrible ordeal of the wilderness crossing and the ocean voyage to the Promised Land.

I have always wondered how I could possibly be weighed in the balance with Paul and Nephi and not found wanting.  Then I have remembered, "Nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted."